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Contents:
1. Be neutral in your way of loving
2. Good ego vs bad ego
3. How to take good risks?
4. You must take care of your parents when they become old
5. Few things which you should remember prior setting your goal?
6. Life is not just about earning money
7. How to keep your mind peaceful?
8. How to stop distractions?
9. How to improve your intelligence?
10. How to improve your self-confidence?
CHAPTER- 1
Be neutral in your way of loving
We all need love in our lives, in every stage of human life, we expect different kinds of love. We all become happy when we reach expectations and become sad when we fail to reach our expectations.
In childhood, we expect parental love from our parents
In adulthood, we expect love from a boyfriend or girlfriend
In marriage, we expect love from our partner
After having children, we expect love from them
After becoming old, we expect our loved ones to be behind us and take care of us.
In most cases, love always hurts you and it will become a weakness in you. The hurt could be in the form of jealousy, possessiveness, fear of losing your loved one, fights or indifference's, selfishness, being stubborn to change accordingly, and overprotective nature. These elements of love are always present either in a successful relationship or a weak relationship.
Love in adulthood
Love in adulthood can be a complex and challenging experience for many individuals. During this period, we may lack the emotional maturity and wisdom to handle our relationships effectively. Hormonal changes can also impact our emotions and lead to us making mistakes in our relationships.
It is important to recognize that our way of loving can have a significant impact on the fictional world of our relationships. If we are immature in our approach to love, we may make decisions that are based on unrealistic expectations or intense emotions, rather than practical considerations. This can lead to conflicts, misunderstandings, and ultimately, the breakdown of our relationships.
As we grow older, we become more aware of the reality of our experiences and are better equipped to handle our emotions. We learn to balance our emotional needs with practical considerations and are more capable of making decisions that are based on reason and logic rather than emotion.
However, unless a person is goal-oriented, it can be challenging for them to control their emotions in adulthood. The intensity of love may be more at this age due to a lack of wisdom and maturity, and people may find themselves in a dilemma where they believe that everyone is good and doing good for them. This can lead to them being blinded to potential red flags or warning signs in their relationships.
It is crucial for individuals to learn to control their intensity or obsession towards their partner. While love is an essential aspect of any relationship, it is important to maintain a balance and not let it control our lives. People should strive to be neutral in both happy and sad times and be mindful of their actions and emotions. Instead of living in a dream world, they should live in the practical world and be aware of their partner's needs and expectations.
Love in adulthood can be a challenging experience, especially if we lack the emotional maturity and wisdom to handle our relationships effectively. It is essential to recognize the impact of our way of loving on the fictional world of our relationships and strive to balance our emotional needs with practical considerations. By being mindful of our actions and emotions, we can build stronger and more fulfilling relationships in our adulthood.
An example of how our way of loving can impact our relationships in adulthood is when we become too possessive or jealous towards our partner. We may have unrealistic expectations of them and may feel threatened by their interactions with others. This can lead to conflicts and misunderstandings in the relationship, and our partner may feel suffocated or controlled.
Another example is when we are too dependent on our partner for our emotional needs. We may expect them to fulfill all our emotional needs, and if they are unable to do so, we may become insecure or resentful. This can lead to a breakdown of the relationship as our partner may feel burdened or overwhelmed by our emotional demands.
In both examples, our way of loving is based on intense emotions rather than practical considerations. We may be blinded to potential red flags or warning signs in the relationship and may make decisions that are not in our best interest. By learning to control our emotions and being mindful of our actions, we can build stronger and healthier relationships in our adulthood.
Love in marriage
Marriage in our country involves most marriages being arranged by parents based on various factors such as financial earnings, character, family background, and horoscope matching. The author is not against arranged marriages, but emphasizes that marriage is not just a love relationship where a boy meets a girl and they share gifts and make love. After marriage, the partners have a lot of responsibilities towards each other, including childbirth, financial security, and caring for the family. Therefore, parental involvement is mandatory in the relationship. Marriage is not just about the couple, but also about their relationship with each other's parents and relatives.
In the initial stages of married life, there may be differences between the couples due to a lack of understanding of each other. Some people enter into marriage with a lot of expectations, while others enter with a fear of losing their freedom. It is important not to expect too much love from marriage because there will often be clashes of dominance and egos involved in decision-making situations.
Instead of having many expectations from your partner, it is better to love your spouse neutrally and try to understand them well in the initial stages of married life. The article highlights the importance of communication and compromise in a marriage, where both partners need to work together to overcome any differences and build a strong foundation for their relationship.
Love in marriage is different from the love relationship we see in movies or books. It requires a lot of effort, patience, and understanding from both partners, and parental involvement is crucial in the success of the relationship.
For example, in India, a young couple may enter into an arranged marriage where their parents have chosen their partner based on various factors such as education, family background, financial status, and horoscope matching. Initially, the couple may have different expectations from each other and may find it challenging to adjust to living together and sharing their lives.
However, with effective communication and mutual understanding, they can work towards building a strong foundation for their marriage. For instance, they may start by discussing their individual expectations and goals for the future, and finding ways to support each other's aspirations.
They may also work towards building a healthy relationship with each other's families, by maintaining regular communication and showing respect and kindness towards their in-laws and extended family members. In cases where conflicts arise, they may seek guidance and support from their parents or other trusted elders in the family.
Over time, as they continue to support and understand each other, they can build a strong emotional connection and a sense of partnership, leading to a successful and fulfilling marriage.
Love with your children
Loving your children is a natural feeling for every parent. However, it is essential to understand that children have their own personality, opinions, and desires, which may not always align with their parents' expectations. As parents, we have to realize that our children are not our possessions, and we cannot control their lives forever. We should raise them with love and care, but we should also prepare them for the world and give them the freedom to make their own decisions.
Overprotective parenting can lead to negative consequences, such as fear of independence, lack of confidence, and inability to make decisions. Parents should allow their children to make mistakes, learn from them, and grow as individuals. It is also important to maintain a balance between love and authority, and not to let our emotions overpower our parenting decisions.
Moreover, loving our children should not be conditional. We should not expect anything in return for our love and sacrifices. Children may show their love in different ways, and it is not necessary that they will always obey their parents. As they grow up, they may have different aspirations, goals, and beliefs, which we should respect and support.
In conclusion, love is an essential element in the relationship between parents and children, but it should be expressed in a balanced and non-judgmental way. As parents, we should raise our children with love and care, prepare them for the future, and respect their individuality and choices. Loving our children should not be a burden or expectation, but a natural feeling that flows from our hearts.
For example:
Let's say a teenage daughter expresses an interest in pursuing a career in art, but her parents want her to become a doctor because they believe it will provide her with a stable and secure future. The parents may feel disappointed or frustrated that their daughter is not following the path they envisioned for her.
However, if they truly love and respect their daughter, they will listen to her aspirations and provide her with support and guidance, even if it is not the path they had in mind. They may encourage her to pursue her passion for art while also helping her explore potential career options and opportunities in that field. By doing so, they are showing unconditional love and respect for their daughter's individuality and choices.
Love with your goal or dream
Loving your goal or dream is a natural feeling that can inspire you to work hard towards achieving it. When you set a goal or dream, you create a clear vision of what you want to achieve and why it's important to you. This helps you stay focused and motivated, even when faced with challenges and setbacks.
However, it's important to maintain a balance and not become too obsessed with your goal or dream. Obsession can cause you to lose sight of other important aspects of your life, such as relationships, health, and self-care. It's essential to keep a neutral approach towards your goals, especially when facing failures or setbacks. This means taking a step back, reassessing your approach, and making changes accordingly.
The journey towards achieving your goals is as important as the destination. It's crucial to enjoy the process and learn from the experiences, even when things don't go as planned. This helps you grow as a person and develop new skills and perspectives that can help you in the future.
Setting realistic and achievable goals is also important. Goals that are too ambitious or unrealistic can lead to disappointment and frustration, and may even cause you to give up altogether. It's important to set goals that align with your values and interests, and that are achievable with the resources and time available to you.
However, if your goals or dreams are causing you more pain and stress than happiness and fulfillment, it might be time to reassess and make changes accordingly. It's important to remember that your goals and dreams should be sources of inspiration and motivation, not sources of anxiety or pressure.
In summary, loving your goal or dream is a positive thing as long as you maintain a balanced and neutral approach towards it. Stay motivated, persistent, and focused on your efforts while enjoying the journey towards achieving your goals. Remember to set realistic goals that align with your values and interests, and be willing to reassess and make changes when necessary.
For example:
Let’s say that you want to become a successful entrepreneur. You have a passion for starting their own business and have a clear vision of what they want to achieve. However, you also understand that starting a business is a challenging and uncertain journey that requires hard work, persistence, and patience.
To maintain a balanced approach, you should set realistic and achievable goals, such as conducting market research, developing a business plan, and networking with potential investors or partners. You should also stay open to feedback and learn from their mistakes and failures along the way.
When facing setbacks, you should maintain a positive mindset and look for opportunities to learn and grow. If your first business idea fails, then you may reassess their approach, pivot their strategy, or explore new business opportunities.
Overall, you should be passionate about their goal of becoming a successful entrepreneur, but they maintain a balanced approach by setting realistic goals, staying persistent, and learning from their experiences.
Love with your money
The statement "Love with your money" refers to how an individual views and values their financial resources. It suggests that loving money too much can lead to negative consequences such as greed, selfishness, and a loss of inner peace.
Money is a materialistic possession that humans created for exchange and to fulfill their basic needs. However, as humans, we tend to value materialistic things more than anything else in life, which can lead to negative consequences. When we love money too much, we may become greedy and selfish, always wanting more and never feeling satisfied with what we have. This can lead to manipulative and cunning behavior, as well as a loss of inner peace.
In addition, we may become too focused on protecting our money and our status, fearing that we may lose it at any moment. This can create a constant state of anxiety and stress, which can have negative effects on our physical and mental health.
One example of this is seen in historical figures like Alexander the Great and Mughal emperor Shah Jahan. Despite their great wealth and power, they could not take their riches with them when they died. This emphasizes the idea that no matter how much we earn, we will eventually leave it all behind in this world.
Therefore, it is important to love money neutrally and use it for its intended purpose, which is to fulfill our basic needs and to support our livelihoods. We should strive to earn what is necessary for us and avoid becoming obsessed with materialistic possessions. Instead, we should focus on living a fulfilling life that is not solely centered around money and wealth.
CHAPTER-2
Good ego vs bad ego
The ego can be defined as our sense of self-importance, self-worth, and identity. It is shaped by our experiences, beliefs, and values, and it influences how we see ourselves and interact with others. When our ego is healthy, it helps us feel confident, capable, and motivated to pursue our goals. However, when our ego becomes too inflated, it can lead to negative behaviors such as arrogance, entitlement, and a lack of empathy.
In many cases, our ego is triggered by situations that threaten our sense of self-worth. For example, if we receive criticism or negative feedback, our ego may react by becoming defensive or dismissive. Similarly, if we feel like our status or reputation is being challenged, our ego may respond by becoming more aggressive or competitive. These behaviors can ultimately harm our relationships, career, and overall well-being.
The epic of Mahabharata is an excellent example of how ego can lead to devastating consequences. The conflict between the Pandavas and the Kauravas ultimately led to a great war that resulted in the loss of many lives. This war was primarily fueled by ego, pride, and the desire for revenge, which blinded both sides to the true cost of their actions.
Drawbacks of bad ego:
Lack of self-awareness:
When we have an inflated ego, we may believe that we are always right and that our way is the best way. This can lead to a lack of self-awareness and an inability to recognize our own weaknesses or faults. This can harm our relationships with others and prevent us from making positive changes in our lives.
Poor decision-making:
A bad ego can make it difficult to make good decisions. When we are focused only on ourselves, we may not consider the needs or perspectives of others. This can lead to decisions that are harmful to ourselves or others. In addition, an overinflated ego may cause us to make rash decisions based on emotion rather than reason.
Damage to reputation:
When our ego is out of control, we may come across as arrogant or difficult to work with. This can harm our relationships with coworkers, clients, and other important people in our lives. A damaged reputation can make it difficult to succeed in our careers and personal lives.
Stress and burnout:
An overinflated ego can also lead to stress and burnout. When we are constantly focused on proving ourselves or protecting our ego, we may become stressed and overwhelmed. This can lead to burnout and a lack of enjoyment in our work or personal life.
Lack of empathy:
A bad ego can prevent us from empathizing with others or understanding their perspective. This can harm our relationships and make it difficult to work effectively in a team. A lack of empathy can also make it difficult to build meaningful connections with others.
Preventing learning and growth:
When we have an unhealthy ego, we may not be open to learning from others or trying new things. This can prevent us from growing and developing as individuals. A bad ego can make us resistant to feedback and make it difficult to learn from our mistakes.
Anger when degraded:
A person with a bad ego can become angry or defensive when they feel they are being degraded or criticized. This can make it difficult for them to take constructive feedback or accept criticism, which can limit their growth and development.
Lack of humility:
A bad ego can prevent a person from being humble and accepting their mistakes or limitations. They may feel the need to always be right, which can limit their ability to learn and grow.
Inability to compromise:
An unhealthy ego can make it difficult for a person to compromise or work collaboratively with others. They may feel that their ideas or opinions are always superior to others, which can lead to conflict and prevent them from achieving their goals.
Risk-taking behavior:
A bad ego can cause a person to take unnecessary risks or make reckless decisions. They may feel invincible or overconfident in their abilities, which can lead to negative consequences.
Overall, an unhealthy ego can have many negative consequences that can harm our personal and professional lives. By recognizing when our ego is getting out of control and practicing humility and empathy, we can avoid these drawbacks and build stronger relationships, make better decisions, and lead a more fulfilling life.
Good ego will benefit you:
While a bad ego can have negative consequences, a good ego can indeed benefit you in many ways. Here are some examples:
Positive attitude: A good ego can help you maintain a positive attitude, even in the face of challenges and setbacks. This can help you stay motivated and focused on your goals.
Self-confidence: A good ego can help you develop healthy self-confidence, which can give you the courage to take on new challenges and pursue your dreams.
Resilience: A good ego can help you bounce back from failures and setbacks, as you believe in your abilities and your capacity to overcome obstacles.
Self-awareness: A good ego can help you be self-aware and recognize your strengths and weaknesses. This can enable you to improve yourself and grow as a person.
Effective communication: A good ego can help you communicate effectively, as you believe in yourself and your ability to express your ideas clearly and confidently.
Leadership: A good ego can help you become an effective leader, as you have the self-assurance and confidence to make difficult decisions and inspire others to follow your lead.
Goal setting: A good ego can help you set ambitious goals for yourself, as you believe in your ability to achieve them and are willing to take risks to make them happen.
You will convince people to make them understand your views: When you have a good ego, you are confident in your own ideas and opinions, but you are also open to other perspectives. You are able to communicate effectively and persuasively, without being confrontational or aggressive. This helps you to build strong relationships and collaborate effectively with others.
You will answer the person who degrades your ego in a cool way until you find the right time:
When someone tries to degrade your ego, a good ego allows you to respond in a calm and measured way, rather than getting angry or defensive. You can take the time to consider your response and find the right moment to address the situation. This helps you to maintain control of the situation and avoid making hasty decisions.
You will use your wisdom even though you are very successful:
A good ego allows you to recognize that you still have room to learn and grow, even if you are already successful. You can use your experience and knowledge to make wise decisions and avoid overconfidence or complacency.
You will maintain cardinal relationships with all types of people:
When you have a good ego, you are able to build strong relationships with people from all walks of life. You treat everyone with respect and dignity, regardless of their social status or background. This helps you to build a diverse network of contacts and allies, which can be invaluable in both personal and professional situations.
You will be satisfied with what you have:
A good ego allows you to appreciate your achievements and be content with what you have, rather than always striving for more. You are able to celebrate your successes without becoming overly attached to them or defining yourself solely by your accomplishments.
You will kneel In front of a stronger person than you:
When you have a good ego, you are secure enough in yourself to acknowledge and respect the strengths of others. You do not feel threatened by someone who is more powerful or successful than you are. Instead, you are able to learn from them and collaborate with them to achieve common goals. This helps you to build strong alliances and avoid unnecessary conflicts.
Overall, a good ego can be a positive force in your life, helping you to achieve your dreams, overcome challenges, and become the best version of yourself.
Example:
A cricket game could be the best example of good ego.
In a cricket match, players use various strategies to gain an advantage over their opponents. One of these strategies is called "sledging," which involves players trying to provoke their opponents by making fun of them or insulting them. This is often done to destabilize the opponent's confidence and focus, and it can be a powerful psychological tool if used effectively.
However, sledging can also backfire if the player targeted by the insults is able to maintain his focus and use the insult as a motivation to perform better.
“ I still remember a game between India and Pakistan in the mid-1990s where one of the players degraded the Indian bowler’s ego, by making fun of him after hitting a four. Which is also called sledging. In the next ball itself, the Indian bowler takes his wicket.”
In the example mentioned above, the Indian bowler's ego was hurt by the opponent's insult, but instead of becoming angry or losing his focus, he used the insult as a motivation to perform better.
This is an example of a "good ego."
A good ego is one that is confident and strong, but not arrogant or overbearing. It is able to take criticism and use it constructively, rather than becoming defensive or reactive. In the case of the Indian bowler, his good ego allowed him to stay focused and use the insult as motivation to take a wicket in the very next ball, proving his ability and shutting down the opponent's attempts to undermine him.
This kind of psychological trick is not limited to sports, but is also used in our daily lives by people who want to manipulate us. A good ego can help us to stay confident and focused, even in the face of criticism or insults, and can help us to use those experiences as opportunities for growth and improvement. It is an important trait to cultivate, both in sports and in life.
CHAPTER-3
How to take good risks?
Taking risks is an inevitable part of life. It's an essential factor that decides the success or failure of our decisions. Whether it's selecting a college or choosing a career path or starting a business or investing money in the stock market, every decision has an inherent risk attached to it. But what separates successful and unsuccessful people is how they deal with those risks.
Successful people take calculated and intelligent risks. They do proper research, weigh the pros and cons, and then make a decision. They don't take impulsive or foolish risks,they understand that every decision has an inherent risk attached to it, and there's no guarantee for success. But they still take risks because they know that taking risks is the only way to move forward in life.
Unsuccessful people, on the other hand, take foolish or impulsive risks. They don't do proper research or weigh the pros and cons. They take risks without understanding the consequences, and when things don't go their way, they blame the circumstances instead of taking responsibility for their decisions.
Taking risks is not just about making a decision; it's also about dealing with the consequences of that decision. Successful people understand that every decision has a risk attached to it, and there's a possibility of failure. But they don't give up on risk-taking just because of failures. They learn from their mistakes, make necessary adjustments, and try again.
There's no success mantra or formula available for risk-taking. Every decision is unique, and every risk has its own set of challenges.
Taking risks is an essential part of life. Every decision has an inherent risk attached to it, and there's no guarantee for success. However, successful people take calculated and intelligent risks, while unsuccessful people take impulsive and foolish risks. There's no success mantra or formula available for risk-taking, but one can minimize the failures and increase the chances of success by doing proper research, weighing the pros and cons, having a backup plan, being prepared to face failure, and not giving up on risk-taking.
There are a few ways that are usually used before taking risks:
Understanding with core knowledge:
Gaining core knowledge is a crucial aspect of risk-taking. Before taking any risk, it is important to gain a solid understanding of the potential risks and consequences involved. This is particularly important in the context of investing, entrepreneurship, or starting a new venture.
For instance, if you are considering investing in a new business or starting your own business, it is important to have a clear understanding of the industry, the competition, and the potential challenges you may face. This requires research and analysis to gather as much information as possible about the market, the target audience, and the competition.
In the context of the restaurant business, gaining core knowledge may involve learning about cooking techniques, food safety standards, and customer preferences. It may also involve studying the local market and identifying opportunities for differentiation and competitive advantage.
Overall, gaining core knowledge is essential for making informed decisions and minimizing the risks associated with any endeavor. It allows you to identify potential problems and come up with effective solutions to overcome them. In addition, it helps you to be more confident in your decision-making and to communicate more effectively with others involved in the process.
Comparing your risks with others who took the same risks:
Comparing your risks with others who took the same risks is a crucial aspect of risk-taking. By doing so, you can evaluate the potential outcomes and consequences of your risk, and minimize the risks of failure.
When you have a new idea, it’s challenging to predict how it will work in the market. In this scenario, you can’t compare your risk with others. However, if you are updating an existing idea, or if your idea is not entirely new, then you can compare it with others who have taken similar risks. This way, you can get an idea of how your risk will work out.
For instance, if you want to start a chocolate business, you can research and compare your idea with other successful chocolate businesses. You can analyze the common trends, strategies, and customer preferences of the successful chocolate businesses. You can also learn from the mistakes of the failed chocolate businesses and avoid them in your business.
By comparing your risks with others who have taken the same risks, you can get valuable insights into the market trends, customer preferences, and strategies. You can also identify potential challenges and drawbacks of your risk and make adjustments accordingly. It's always better to learn from the experiences of others and avoid making the same mistakes.
In conclusion, comparing your risks with others who took the same risks is a smart move in risk-taking. It helps you understand the market, minimize risks, and maximize the potential for success.
Always risk at the right time
Timing is an essential factor to consider when taking a risk because it can significantly impact the outcome of your decision. Taking a risk at the wrong time can lead to failure, while taking a risk at the right time can lead to success. In business, timing is a critical factor that can determine the success or failure of a venture.
For instance, if you decide to start a business during an economic downturn, you will face significant challenges, including reduced consumer spending, tight credit conditions, and high levels of unemployment. These factors can negatively impact your business and increase the likelihood of failure. Similarly, if you decide to invest in the stock market during a bear market, you may end up losing money due to the downward trend of the market.
On the other hand, taking a risk at the right time can lead to success. For example, if you invest in a business that is in a growing industry, you are more likely to succeed because the market is expanding, and there is more demand for the products or services offered by the business. Similarly, if you invest in the stock market during a bull market, you are more likely to make money due to the upward trend of the market.
In conclusion, the timing of your risk is critical, and you should carefully evaluate the timing of your decision before taking a risk. You should consider factors such as market conditions, consumer behavior, and economic trends before making a decision. By doing so, you can increase the likelihood of success and minimize the risk of failure.
Prepare for the worst
It is essential to understand that risks always involve uncertainty, and no matter how much research and preparation you do, there is always a chance of failure.
Being too optimistic about the success of your risk can lead to overlooking the potential risks and downsides. Instead, it is essential to be practical and prepare for the worst-case scenario. This means having a backup plan, keeping some reserves, and being ready to face the consequences if things don't go as planned.
It is also important to understand that risks involve trade-offs. While taking a risk can lead to significant rewards, it also involves taking on potential losses. It is up to the individual to weigh the potential rewards against the potential losses and decide whether or not to take the risk.
In conclusion, taking risks is an essential part of life, but it is important to be practical, prepared for the worst-case scenario, and understand that there is no guarantee of success.
Always have a plan B and plan C
Having a backup plan is indeed important when taking risks. It helps you prepare for unforeseen circumstances and provides you with alternatives if your initial plan doesn't work out. As you mentioned, having two plans is even better because it gives you more options to consider.
For example if you are preparing for an exam, it's important to not only focus on the preparations for the exam but also to have a backup plan in case you don't achieve the desired result. This could mean exploring other options such as taking the exam again, pursuing a different career path, or starting your own business.
Having a backup plan can also help reduce the stress and anxiety associated with taking risks. It provides you with a sense of security and a safety net in case things don't go as planned.
However, it's important to remember that having a backup plan doesn't mean you should be complacent with your initial plan. You should still give it your best shot and work hard towards achieving your goal.
Try to take a safe risk
Taking risks is an important part of achieving success and growth, but it's also important to minimize potential losses. One way to do this is by diversifying your investments and only risking a small portion of your total capital.
For example, if you have a total investment portfolio of one crore rupees, it would be wise to only invest a small portion, say ten lakh rupees, into a risky opportunity.
This way, even if the investment fails, you won't lose your entire portfolio and will have the ability to recover.
By only risking a small amount, you can also gain valuable experience and knowledge about the industry or opportunity without putting all of your resources on the line. This can help you make better decisions in the future and potentially lead to greater success in the long run.
In short, taking calculated risks is important for growth and success, but it's always important to consider the potential downside and only risk a small portion of your total investment portfolio.
Don’t be afraid before taking a risk
Fear of taking risks is a common feeling among many individuals, and it can be quite paralyzing. When you are afraid of taking risks, you tend to stay in your comfort zone, which can limit your potential for growth and success. Your fear can stop you from taking action or making decisions, which can lead to missed opportunities.
The fear of losing money or time is understandable, but it's important to remember that taking risks is a necessary part of growth and progress. Without taking risks, you may not achieve your full potential, and you may miss out on opportunities that could lead to success.
It's important to assess the risks carefully and weigh the potential benefits and drawbacks before taking any action. You should also consider your risk tolerance and personal goals when making decisions. If you are too afraid to take risks, it's better to take a step back and evaluate the situation before making any hasty decisions.
Fear can cloud your judgement and prevent you from making rational decisions. It's important to address your fears and find ways to overcome them. This may involve seeking advice from experts, building a support network, or simply taking small steps towards your goals to build confidence and reduce anxiety.
Ultimately, it's important to find a balance between caution and taking calculated risks that can lead to growth and success
Don’t be overconfident before taking a risk
Certainly. Confidence is important when taking a risk, as it gives you the courage to move forward and take action. Without confidence, it can be difficult to make decisions or take steps towards your goals. However, when confidence turns into overconfidence, it can be dangerous.
Overconfidence can cause people to ignore important details or warning signs, as they believe that they already have everything under control. This can lead to a lack of preparation or planning, which can ultimately lead to failure. Additionally, overconfidence can lead to a false sense of security, which can make people more susceptible to risks that they would normally avoid.
For example,i know a person who was so confident in his ability to secure a government job that they made reckless decisions, such as making fake declarations to a girl and marrying her. When they found out that they were not selected for the job, they were faced with the consequences of their actions. This situation could have been avoided if the person had maintained a healthy level of confidence, while also being realistic about the outcome of their job application.
In summary, while confidence is important when taking risks, it is essential to avoid becoming overconfident. By maintaining a balanced perspective, you can better prepare for potential challenges and increase your chances of success.
Be positive after taking a risk
Being positive after taking a risk is essential to maintain your mental health and to keep moving forward. Waiting for the results of a risk can be an anxious and stressful time, but it's important to stay positive and hopeful.
If you have taken a risk like releasing a product into the market, instead of worrying about whether it will sell or not, focus on the positive aspects of the product, and the effort you have put into it. Keep in mind that success may not come overnight, and it may take some time for your product to gain traction in the market.
Similarly, after taking an exam or giving an interview, instead of worrying about whether you performed well or not, think positively about the effort you put in, and the skills and knowledge you have gained in the process. Even if the outcome isn't what you expected, try to focus on the positives and learn from your experience.
In short, being positive after taking a risk is important because it helps you to maintain your motivation and confidence, and to move forward with a growth mindset.
Don’t share your risk with others
While it's true that everyone has their own perception of risk and their own experiences that shape their opinions, it's not always advisable to completely avoid sharing your risk with others. Sharing your risk with someone who has a relevant experience or expertise can help you make a more informed decision and avoid potential pitfalls.
For example, if you are considering investing in a particular market or industry, it could be helpful to speak with someone who has already invested in that market or industry to get their perspective and advice. However, it's important to carefully choose who you share your risk with and ensure that they have the relevant expertise or experience to provide helpful insights.
Additionally, it's important to remember that ultimately, the decision to take a risk is yours and you should trust your own judgment and instincts. Don't let the opinions of others completely sway your decision, but rather use their insights as one factor in your decision-making process.
Take a risk that could be useful for a multi-purposeful future
Taking a risk that could be useful for a multi-purposeful future is a smart way to minimize potential losses and increase the chances of success. This approach allows you to not only focus on one specific outcome, but also to consider other opportunities and avenues that could arise in the future.
In the example of starting a milk business, having machinery that can be used to make a variety of products in case the milk business does not work out is a smart move. It allows for flexibility and the ability to pivot the business in a different direction if needed. This can help reduce the risk of losing all the investment in case of failure.
Similarly, in the case of studying abroad, selecting a country that provides more opportunities for employment and growth is a wise decision. The Schengen countries in Europe offer multiple opportunities and a wider job market due to the shared visa system. By learning the local language of a specific country, one can further increase their chances of success in that particular market, while also having the option to explore other opportunities within the Schengen area.
Conclusion
In conclusion, taking a risk that could be useful for a multi-purposeful future provides a safety net and allows for flexibility and adaptability in case the original plan does not work out. It is a smart strategy to minimize potential losses and increase the chances of success.
CHAPTER-4
You must take care of your parents when they become old
God is the creator of all living organisms in this universe and our parents are creators of us. If they have thought that we are unnecessary then we might not open our eyes and could see this beautiful life. God created our parents just because it’s not possible for recreation from his end. We might not see God in our lifetime but we can see God in the form of our parents. You might say that birth and death are part of the life cycle and it’s a biological process.
The real meaning of God is “Generator, organizer, destroyer”. So, giving birth(generation), taking care(organizing), and canceling the birth(destruction) are completely in the hands of every parent. I am sure now you might have understood why our parents are equant to God.
Giving birth is not an easy task, every mother has to go through a lot of responsibility by carrying the child for nine months before childbirth. Usually, every father has to take care of her wife, when she was pregnant. Every mother might have gone through intense pain for giving birth and yet she feels the pain as a responsibility.
After giving birth to you, they might have sacrificed so many things. Either it could be their joy, free time, desires, etc. They might have awakened all night to make you sleep when you were disturbing them with your loud cry. They might have sacrificed so many things in their life, to satisfy your dreams and wishes. Your father might have helped with your homework in your school, and he might have answered patiently many stupid questions, which you asked. Your mother might have eaten less food if the food was scarce in your home and yet she might have been satisfied with your satisfaction.
Parenting is not an easy task; it is filled with a lot of sacrifices and responsibilities. And that is the reason why our parents are like God to us. They give us unconditional love without expecting anything in return but it's our responsibility to take care of them whenever they require us, especially when they become old. But sadly, few people don’t like to take care of their parents after their marriage and children. They feel like their old parents like an additional burden for them, so either they throw them out or make them join in an old age home.
Reversal phase
Few children complain that their old parents are stubborn and argumentative with old ethics. Before saying this, you have to remember one thing that, psychologically every human brain after maturing goes into the “Phycological Reversal Phase”. In simple terms when a human becomes old, they start behaving like a child. That’s the reason most grandparents have an instant connection with their grandchildren due to the “Reversal phase”. It means every old person behaves like a small child who is stubborn and argumentative. You can ask any person about their relationship with their grandparents, I am sure they would say that their grandparents are their best friends. Especially when you are a child, you will have a profound bond with your grandparent, because they both share everything. I still remember my childhood days with my grandmother, when we used to watch cartoons, play chess, and share jokes when my parents were busy with their work. She was my best friend at that time.
You might be giving a bad example for your children
You might be thinking that avoiding your parents or ill-treating them is the right thing to do, but don’t forget that your children are watching you and your behavior towards your parents. When you become old, they might do the same thing to you too, because even good parenting is a part of a culture. And this culture would reflect your children’s mindset and their children's too. Our culture is like ancestral property which would be shared with the next generations. So be careful and aware of your consequences before ill-treating and avoiding your parents.
Don’t forget the sacrifices they did for you
Children are an additional burden for every parent if they belong to a middle-class family because it is more crucial for them to take care due to financial issues. They must sacrifice their expenses to take care of their children. They take debts from banks and give their children a good education because they feel like their children’s dream is their dream.
Be a parent to your elderly parents
When you are in the young phase, your parents bathe you for your hygiene body and feed you healthy food, to make sure you don’t catch bad diseases. They bare you when you scream and cry aloud, they will convince you patiently when you demand something. But most of us become reluctant and impatient to take care of our elderly parents because we feel it’s disgusting and unwanted. Just imagine what every parent might have thought just like those reluctant children who don’t want to take care of their parents. I am sure 90% of children might have died if every parent behaves disinterestedly in taking care of their children’s health and food. So, take care of your parents when they become old.
If you neglect it, then your karma might hit back in your next birth
According to Newton's third law, every action has an equal and opposite reaction. In the same way, all your actions might be a reaction for you in this birth or the next birth. So, be careful before mistreating your old parents. God watches everything and records every situation of your life. All your karmas will come back to you in this birth or next for sure.
Because they bared all your stupidity
Most of the kids are hyperactive and controlling their activeness is highly impossible. Few kids either might have hurt or hurt some others with their crazy behavior. I still remember how many times I have visited the hospital due to my hyperactivity in my childhood. I am sure all our parents might have postponed their daily work for sake of us. Not only they bared our stupidity but also, they are the most emotionally affected people when we are in pain. It might be just an injury for us, but for them, it’s a big worry due to their compassionate love towards us.
They could be good friends as well as a guide to your children
If you ask most children about their best friends then they will answer that their grandparents were their best friends to them, because they play and be patient with their stupidity. They can not only be good friends for your children but also, they are very good guides for them. They could share all their experiences about good and bad things in a very loving and convincing way. Children could learn good information about our culture, ethics, and principles from their grandparents, which are very mandatory for a growing child. I still remember how my grandmother used to share all the ethics and culture of our past, which I still today follow.
Don’t be vindictive toward your parent’s strict behavior
I am sure most of the parents of every child are strict towards their children due to their concern for their child. Few children become offensive and create a bad impression of their parent's past strict behavior. Few children remember every strict behavior of their parents and develop grudges when they grow up. But I strongly believe that every father has to be strict and less emotional towards their children, whereas every mother has to be emotional support and protection to children. By doing this every parent manages to love and fear together towards their children. If both parents are emotional and friendly towards their children then there are possibilities that their child could adopt bad characteristics from their surroundings, and this is called balanced parenting. If your father was strict towards your profession and education then don’t be vindictive, it might irritate you at that moment but that’s how every father has to be. Whereas every mother is concerned about their children’s whereabouts and behaves overprotective. Even this kind of behavior could annoy a few children, but this behavior is nothing but their love and concern for their children.
Most parents behave like this due to the circumstances which are going on around us. I am sure despite being strict towards their children, every father loves wholeheartedly and despite being overprotective, every mother loves her children. They do behave like this because they know how this world is and they have experienced everything and they are highly mature. So, always take care of your parents, when they become old.
CHAPTER- 5
Few things which you should remember prior setting your goal?
Setting a goal is an essential step towards achieving success in life. It helps us to identify our purpose, motivate us to take action, and move forward in a particular direction. The earlier we set our goals, the better it is, as it gives us more time to work towards it. However, it's never too late to start working on our goals. As long as we are willing to put in the effort and follow a few essential rules, we can achieve our goals at any age.
Few rules for achieving your goal are:
Your goal has to be consistent
Consistency is indeed a critical trait for achieving success in any area of life, including accomplishing one's goals. Setting a goal is easy, but following through on it is not always as easy, especially when challenges arise. The ability to remain consistent in the face of obstacles and challenges is what sets successful people apart from those who fail.
To be consistent, you need to have a clear vision of what you want to achieve and why it is important to you. You also need to be willing to put in the hard work and effort required to make progress towards your goal. This means being disciplined and committed, even when it's difficult or when progress is slow.
Consistency also requires resilience and perseverance. There will inevitably be setbacks and failures along the way, but successful people don't let those setbacks derail them from their goals. Instead, they learn from their mistakes, adjust their strategies, and keep moving forward.
For example there was a choreographer-turned-actor-turned-director, his inconsistency and lack of commitment to any one pursuit ultimately led to his failures. He was unable to stay focused on one goal and see it through to completion. This is a valuable lesson for anyone setting goals - it's important to choose a goal that you are truly passionate about and committed to, and then remain consistent and focused on it, even when faced with challenges and setbacks
You should never give up
I still remember, there was a girl who was preparing for her EMCET exam (Which is an entrance exam for Graduates). She was the daughter of a small fruit vendor near my house. Unpredictably her father left her family and married other women leaving her and her mother in a financial crunch. But she didn’t give up her studies, instead, she used to read in her free time in front of her small shop and used to read when there are no customers. It continued for another year and finally, she got a merit rank in the entrance exam and got admission for free.
It's a very inspiring story right?, and it's true that we should never give up on our goals and dreams, even when faced with challenges and obstacles. Persistence and determination are key traits that can help us overcome difficulties and achieve success in our pursuits.
It's important to remember that setbacks and failures are a natural part of the learning process, and they can often teach us valuable lessons that we can use to improve and grow. Rather than giving up, we should try to learn from our mistakes, adapt our strategies, and keep moving forward.
Your goal has to be your priority
When we set a goal for ourselves, it's important to give it the highest priority in our lives. This means that we should allocate our time, energy, and resources in a way that supports our goal and moves us closer to achieving it. This may involve making sacrifices, such as saying no to other commitments or activities that do not align with our goal.
By prioritizing our goal, we send a clear message to ourselves and others that it is important to us, and we are committed to making it happen. This can help to increase our motivation, focus, and determination, which are all important factors in achieving success.
However, it's important to strike a balance between our goal and other important aspects of our lives. For example, we may have responsibilities to our family, friends, or work that also require our attention and time. It's important to find a way to balance these competing demands, while still prioritizing our goal.
One way to do this is to break down our goal into smaller, manageable steps, and allocate time for each step on a regular basis. This can help to ensure that we are making progress towards our goal, even if we have other commitments and responsibilities.
Additionally, it's important to take care of ourselves and our overall well-being. This means making time for regular exercise, healthy eating, and self-care activities, such as meditation or relaxation. By prioritizing our health and well-being, we can increase our energy, focus, and resilience, which can help us to achieve our goal more effectively.
In summary, prioritizing our goal is important for achieving success, but we must also find a way to balance it with other important aspects of our lives. By breaking down our goal into smaller steps, allocating time for each step, and prioritizing our health and well-being, we can increase our chances of success while still living a balanced and fulfilling life.
You should be disciplined
Discipline is a set of behaviors that we adopt in order to achieve a specific goal or set of goals. It involves self-control, consistency, and focus, all of which are necessary for achieving success in any endeavor.
At its core, discipline involves establishing routines and habits that support our goals. This may involve setting aside specific times each day or week for focused work, exercise, or self-care activities. By establishing these routines, we create a sense of structure and consistency in our lives, which can help us stay focused and motivated towards our goals.
However, discipline also requires us to exercise self-control and resist temptations and distractions that can derail our progress. For example, if we are trying to eat healthy in order to lose weight, we may need to resist the temptation to eat junk food or indulge in unhealthy snacks. Similarly, if we are trying to build a successful business, we may need to say no to social events or other commitments that do not align with our goals.
In addition to establishing routines and exercising self-control, discipline also requires us to stay focused on our goals over the long term. This means staying committed to our goals even when we face setbacks or challenges, and remaining persistent in the face of obstacles. It also means being willing to make sacrifices and put in the hard work required to achieve our goals.
Overall, discipline is a critical factor in achieving success in any area of life. By establishing routines, exercising self-control, and staying focused on our goals over the long term, we can build the habits and behaviors that support our success and lead us towards a fulfilling and meaningful life.
Don’t bother about others' who don’t support you
Not everyone we know or interact with will share the same goals or vision that we have for ourselves. In fact, some may actively discourage us from pursuing what we believe is important or fulfilling. This can be discouraging and disheartening, especially if the people we care about the most are not supportive.
However, it is important to recognize that our dreams and goals are our own, and we are responsible for taking the necessary steps to achieve them. While support from others can be helpful, it is not always essential or guaranteed. Therefore, it is important to cultivate our own sense of self-confidence and belief in our abilities.
One way to do this is to surround ourselves with people who share similar goals and aspirations. By seeking out mentors or peers who are pursuing similar paths, we can receive support and guidance from those who understand the challenges and rewards of our chosen path.
Another way to cultivate self-confidence is to focus on developing the skills and knowledge needed to achieve our goals. This may involve pursuing further education or training, seeking out relevant experiences or opportunities, or simply practicing and honing our skills on our own.
Finally, it is important to remember that setbacks and failures are a natural part of the journey towards any goal. Rather than giving up or becoming discouraged, we can use these experiences as opportunities to learn and grow. By staying focused on our goals and persevering in the face of challenges, we can achieve success on our own terms, regardless of the support (or lack thereof) from others.
Should be able to handle yourself in ups and downs
When you are going in the direction of your goal, you should often remember that you will face lots of ups and downs in your life. The ups and downs could be in the form of temporary achievements and failures. Despite having many ups and downs, you should be able to reach your destination.
Have you ever observed the ocean waves? despite having ups and downs for its waves (the gravitational pull of the sun and moon on earth), the ocean still succeeds to reach the land. In the same way, you should be able to reach your goal with ups and downs in your life.
Always keep realistic goals
The importance of setting realistic goals cannot be overstated. Realistic goals are those that are achievable and attainable within a reasonable timeframe, given your resources, skills, and abilities. When setting unrealistic goals, you set yourself up for failure and disappointment, which can be demotivating and discouraging.
For instance, if you have no prior experience in writing and have never written anything before, setting a goal to become a best-selling author within a year is unrealistic. Similarly, if you have no background in finance or entrepreneurship, setting a goal to become a billionaire in a year is unrealistic.
Setting unrealistic goals can lead to frustration, low self-esteem, and a sense of failure. It can also make it difficult for you to set future goals and hinder your personal and professional growth.
Therefore, it is important to set realistic goals that challenge you but are achievable. You should consider your current resources, skills, and abilities, and plan your goals accordingly. Setting realistic goals will increase your chances of success, boost your confidence, and motivate you to pursue your aspirations.
Be prepared for failures:
Yes, that's right. Failures are a part of life, and it's important to be mentally and emotionally prepared for them. Failure should not be viewed as the end of the road but as an opportunity for growth and learning. It's important to have a backup plan in case things don't go as expected, and to keep pushing forward towards your goals.
When we encounter failure, we tend to learn valuable lessons that we can use to improve our skills, knowledge, and overall approach to our goals. Failure also helps us to build resilience and the ability to bounce back from setbacks. This resilience can be invaluable in helping us to overcome obstacles and continue working towards our goals.
However, it's important to note that being prepared for failure doesn't mean that we should expect to fail. It simply means that we should acknowledge the possibility of failure and be ready to face it if it happens. It's also important to remember that failure is not a reflection of our worth or abilities, but simply a part of the journey towards success.
Work is worship:
"Work is worship" is a phrase that highlights the importance of dedicating oneself to their work or goal with sincerity and devotion. It implies that one should treat their work as a form of worship, and approach it with a sense of commitment, discipline, and respect.
When you approach your work as a form of worship, you give it your best effort and attention. You are more likely to be diligent, focused, and dedicated in your work, which can lead to greater productivity, creativity, and success. This attitude towards work can help you stay motivated and committed, even in the face of challenges and obstacles.
Furthermore, when you approach your work as worship, you are likely to experience a sense of fulfillment and satisfaction in what you do. You begin to see your work as something that adds value to your life and the lives of others, rather than just a means to an end. This sense of purpose and meaning can help you stay motivated and inspired, and make your work more enjoyable and rewarding.
Overall, the phrase "work is worship" encourages individuals to approach their work or goals with a sense of dedication, discipline, and respect. By doing so, they are more likely to achieve their goals and experience a sense of fulfillment and satisfaction in their work.
Should be able to control your emotions:
Controlling your emotions is an important aspect of personal and professional growth. Emotions such as anger, fear, and anxiety can often cloud our judgment and lead to poor decision-making. Therefore, it's important to learn how to manage our emotions in a constructive way.
One way to control your emotions is by taking a step back and analyzing the situation objectively. Try to understand the underlying causes of your emotions and the impact they could have on your actions. This will help you make more rational decisions based on facts rather than emotions.
Another way to manage your emotions is by practicing mindfulness or meditation. These practices can help you develop greater self-awareness and emotional intelligence, which can enable you to respond to situations in a more measured and thoughtful way.
It's also important to remember that emotions are a natural part of being human and it's okay to experience them. The key is to not let them control your behavior or lead you to make hasty decisions. By learning how to manage your emotions, you can develop greater resilience and be better equipped to handle the ups and downs of life.
You should learn to work under pressure:
Learning to work under pressure is an important skill that can help you succeed in both your personal and professional life. When you're able to work effectively under pressure, you can meet tight deadlines, handle challenging situations, and make good decisions even in stressful circumstances.
To work effectively under pressure, it's important to stay organized and focused. Make a plan of action and prioritize your tasks based on their importance and deadline. Break down larger tasks into smaller, more manageable chunks, and tackle them one at a time. It's also important to stay calm and avoid getting overwhelmed by the situation. Take breaks when needed, and engage in activities that help you relax and recharge.
One way to improve your ability to work under pressure is to practice. Take on challenging tasks and assignments that push you out of your comfort zone. This can help you develop resilience and the ability to handle pressure with greater ease. Additionally, seek feedback from others and learn from your experiences. Analyze what worked well and what didn't, and use that knowledge to improve your approach in the future.
In summary, learning to work effectively under pressure can help you achieve your goals and succeed in life. With the right mindset, preparation, and practice, you can develop this important skill and thrive even in the most challenging situations.
Try to make good decisions:
Decision-making is a critical skill that can make or break your success. When making decisions, take the time to weigh your options, consider the consequences, and seek advice from trusted sources. Avoid making hasty or impulsive decisions based on emotions or ego. Instead, aim to make informed and thoughtful decisions that align with your goals.
long term goals and short-term goals
Long-term goals and short-term goals are two different types of goals that are necessary for achieving success in life. A long-term goal is a desired outcome that can take several years to achieve, whereas a short-term goal is a smaller and more immediate target that helps you to reach your long-term goal.
Long-term goals are essential for creating a sense of direction and purpose in life. They help you to focus on the big picture and give you a reason to work hard and stay motivated. Long-term goals can be related to career, education, relationships, health, or any other aspect of life that you consider important. Examples of long-term goals include getting a degree, starting a business, buying a house, or saving for retirement.
Short-term goals, on the other hand, are specific, measurable, and achievable targets that you can accomplish in a relatively short period of time. Short-term goals are important because they help you to break down your long-term goals into manageable chunks. They provide a sense of accomplishment and progress, and they help you to stay focused and motivated.
Examples of short-term goals include finishing a project, learning a new skill, exercising regularly, or saving a certain amount of money each month.
The relationship between long-term goals and short-term goals is that short-term goals are the stepping stones that lead to the achievement of long-term goals. When you have a long-term goal, you need to break it down into smaller, achievable short-term goals. This helps you to see progress and stay motivated. Each short-term goal you achieve brings you one step closer to your long-term goal.
In summary, having both long-term and short-term goals is essential for success in life. Long-term goals provide a sense of direction and purpose, while short-term goals help you to break down your long-term goals into manageable steps. By focusing on both types of goals, you can achieve your desired outcomes and reach your full potential.
CHAPTER- 6
Life is not just about earning money
There are many other important aspects to life beyond the pursuit of wealth. It's true that in modern society, money is often seen as a measure of success, and many people spend a lot of time and effort chasing after it. However, while money is certainly important for meeting our basic needs and achieving a certain level of comfort and security, it's not the only thing that matters.
When we are children, we often face pressure to perform well in school and get good grades. While education is certainly important for our future success, it's also important to remember to enjoy our childhood and not get too caught up in the pursuit of academic achievement at the expense of our well-being and happiness.
As we grow up and enter the workforce, there is often a lot of pressure to earn money and establish ourselves in our careers. While it's important to be financially responsible and secure, it's also important to remember that work is not the only thing that matters. We should strive for a healthy work-life balance and make time for the things that bring us joy and fulfillment outside of work.
Furthermore, as we get older, we may become focused on other goals such as getting married and starting a family. While these are important milestones for many people, it's important to remember that relationships and family are not just about financial security. We should strive to build strong, loving relationships with our partners and children, and prioritize our emotional well-being over material possessions or status symbols.
In short, the message of "life is not just earning money" is a reminder that there are many important aspects to life beyond the pursuit of wealth and status. While money is certainly important, it's not the only thing that matters, and we should strive to find balance and fulfillment in all areas of our lives because,
Life is unpredictable
Life is indeed unpredictable, and we never know what the future holds for us. No matter how much we plan and prepare, we cannot control everything that happens to us. This is why it's important to cherish every moment and appreciate the little things in life.
We often get caught up in our day-to-day routine and forget to take a step back and reflect on our lives. It's easy to get lost in the pursuit of material possessions and forget about the things that truly matter, such as our relationships with loved ones, our health, and our happiness.
It's important to remember that we cannot take our earnings with us when we die, and no amount of money or possessions can stop the inevitable. What truly matters in life are the memories we create with the people we love, and the impact we have on the world around us.
We should strive to live our lives in a way that makes us happy and fulfilled, while also making a positive impact on others. We should cherish the moments we have with our loved ones and never take them for granted. We should also be grateful for the things we have in life, instead of constantly craving more.
In the end, what truly matters is not how much we earn or how successful we are, but the legacy we leave behind and the memories we create with the people we love. Life is unpredictable, but we can make the most of it by living every moment to the fullest and appreciating the simple joys of life.
Life is about taking care of your loved ones
The idea that life is about taking care of your loved ones is an important one that is often overlooked in our society. We often get caught up in our own lives, our own goals, and forget that we have responsibilities towards the people we care about.
In many cultures, it is considered a duty to take care of our parents when they grow old. Our parents gave us life, raised us, and provided for us, so it's only natural that we return the favor when they need us the most. However, in our fast-paced and individualistic society, many people have forgotten this duty, and they either abandon their parents or leave them in old age homes.
This abandonment can have serious consequences for both the parents and the children. For the parents, it can be a devastating blow to their self-esteem and sense of self-worth. They may feel that they have been rejected by the people they love the most and who they thought would always be there for them. They may also face health problems that require special care, and without the support of their children, they may struggle to get the care they need.
For the children, the consequences of abandoning their parents can be equally severe. They may feel guilt, shame, and regret for their actions, and they may struggle to find a way to make things right. They may also face a sense of isolation and loneliness, as they have lost an important part of their lives.
It's important to remember that our actions have consequences, and the way we treat our parents can have a profound impact on our own lives and the lives of our children. By taking care of our parents, we are not only fulfilling our duty, but we are also setting an example for our children to follow. We are teaching them the value of family, love, and responsibility, and we are giving them the tools they need to become responsible and caring adults.
In conclusion, life is about taking care of your loved ones. It's about recognizing the people who have made sacrifices for us and repaying them with love and care when they need us the most. It's about setting an example for our children, and teaching them the value of family and responsibility. So, let's not forget our duty towards our parents and loved ones, and let's make sure that we give them the care and support they deserve.
Life is building long-lasting relationships
One of the most important aspects of a fulfilling life is the ability to form and maintain deep, meaningful relationships with other people. Such relationships are often based on shared values, mutual respect, and emotional connection. However, in recent times, there has been a shift towards materialistic considerations when it comes to relationships.
It is true that in the past, people were more likely to fall in love based on a person's character, rather than their financial status. This is because character traits such as honesty, kindness, and empathy were considered more important than wealth or material possessions.
However, in today's society, people often place more emphasis on financial stability when it comes to choosing a partner.
This shift towards materialistic considerations can be attributed to several factors. Firstly, the cost of living has increased significantly, and people are finding it harder to make ends meet. As a result, financial stability has become more important in order to ensure a comfortable and secure lifestyle.
Additionally, social media and popular culture have normalized the idea of wealth as a marker of success and desirability, leading people to prioritize financial status over character traits.
While financial stability is important in a relationship, it should not be the sole determinant of a person's worth or desirability. Relationships based solely on material considerations are unlikely to be fulfilling in the long run, as they lack the emotional connection and shared values that are necessary for true intimacy. Ultimately, the key to building long-lasting relationships lies in finding a balance between material considerations and character traits, and prioritizing emotional connection and shared values above all else.
Life is not just about earning money
The statement "life is not just about earning money" highlights the fact that there are many aspects to a fulfilling and meaningful life beyond financial gain. While money is certainly important for meeting our basic needs and achieving a certain level of comfort and security, it is not the only factor that contributes to happiness and well-being.
Unfortunately, in today's society, there is a widespread obsession with money and material possessions. Many people believe that the pursuit of wealth is the key to happiness, and are willing to go to great lengths to earn more money. This can lead to a number of negative outcomes, including increased stress, anxiety, and burnout, as well as a lack of meaningful relationships and a sense of purpose.
Furthermore, some people resort to unethical or illegal means to earn money, such as deceiving others or engaging in fraud. This not only harms others, but also erodes one's own sense of integrity and self-worth.
The question of how much money we need to be happy is a complex one, as it depends on a variety of individual factors, such as personality, values, and life circumstances.
However, research has shown that beyond a certain point, increasing levels of wealth do not necessarily lead to greater happiness or life satisfaction. This is known as the "hedonic treadmill" effect, where people adapt to their new level of wealth and quickly return to their baseline level of happiness.
Ultimately, the pursuit of money and material possessions should not come at the expense of our health, well-being, and relationships. We should strive to find a balance between our financial goals and our other priorities, such as personal growth, meaningful relationships, and contributing to society. By focusing on these aspects of life, we can cultivate a sense of purpose and fulfillment that extends far beyond our bank accounts.
Life is about helping
While financial wealth can certainly make it easier to help others, it is not a prerequisite for generosity and compassion. Regardless of our financial situation, we all have the ability to give back and make a meaningful impact in the lives of those around us.
Unfortunately, many of us become overly focused on accumulating wealth and material possessions, which can make us less likely to give to others. We may fear losing our financial security or feel that we don't have enough resources to spare.
However, as the statement suggests, even small acts of kindness and generosity can have a significant impact on those in need.
It is true that we need to value and protect our own financial well-being, but this should not come at the expense of helping others. By finding ways to give back and support those who are less fortunate, we can cultivate a sense of purpose and fulfillment that extends beyond our own personal gain.
Moreover, helping others can strengthen our relationships, build our sense of empathy and compassion, and enhance our overall well-being.
As the statement suggests, even small amounts of financial support can make a big difference in the lives of others. By redirecting some of our spending towards charitable causes or direct aid, we can make a tangible impact on the well-being of those around us. Ultimately, life is not just about accumulating wealth, but also about using our resources to help others and make a positive impact in the world.
Life is enjoying the simple things
In our fast-paced and materialistic society, we often overlook the simple pleasures in life in our pursuit of success and wealth. However, by taking the time to notice and enjoy the small things, we can find happiness and contentment in our everyday lives.
The example of enjoying the rain is a perfect illustration of this point. While many of us may see rain as an inconvenience, by taking the time to appreciate its sights, sounds, and smells, we can find joy in a seemingly mundane experience. The same principle can be applied to many other aspects of life, such as the beauty of nature, the warmth of a friendly conversation, or the satisfaction of completing a small task.
When we focus on enjoying the simple things, we are reminded of the beauty and wonder of the world around us. We become more mindful and present in our daily lives, which can improve our overall well-being and reduce stress and anxiety. Moreover, by finding joy in the simple things, we can break free from the endless pursuit of material possessions and societal expectations, and find true happiness on our own terms.
It is worth noting that enjoying the simple things does not mean giving up on our goals and aspirations. Rather, it means finding a healthy balance between striving for success and appreciating the beauty of life along the way. By taking time to enjoy the simple things, we can find the motivation and inspiration we need to pursue our dreams with renewed vigor and purpose.
By cultivating a sense of appreciation and gratitude for the small things, we can lead more fulfilling and meaningful lives, while also pursuing our goals and ambitions with renewed vigor and purpose.
Money cannot replace you
The statement "money cannot replace you" emphasizes the importance of human connection and the emotional value of spending time with our loved ones. While money may be able to buy material possessions and provide financial security, it cannot replace the emotional bond and connection that we have with the people we care about.
Often, in our pursuit of success and wealth, we may prioritize work and career over spending time with our loved ones. We may think that buying expensive gifts or providing financial support is enough to show our love and affection. However, it is important to remember that true love and connection are built on shared experiences and meaningful interactions.
Spending quality time with our loved ones allows us to connect on a deeper level, share our thoughts and feelings, and create memories that will last a lifetime. Whether it is taking a walk together, enjoying a meal, or simply talking and listening to each other, these moments of connection are priceless and cannot be replaced by material possessions.
Moreover, investing time in our relationships can have significant benefits for our overall well-being. Studies have shown that people with strong social connections are happier, healthier, and more resilient to stress and adversity. By prioritizing our relationships and taking time to nurture them, we can improve our own emotional and physical health, as well as the well-being of those around us.
While money may have its benefits, it cannot replace the emotional value of spending time with our loved ones. By prioritizing our relationships and investing time in them, we can create strong bonds of love and connection that will last a lifetime.
Life is about having hope
Life can be full of challenges and difficulties, ranging from health problems, financial struggles, broken relationships, and various other problems. These problems can often lead us to feel overwhelmed, stressed, and hopeless. However, it's important to remember that life is also full of opportunities and possibilities.
One of the most important things to remember when facing challenges in life is to have hope. Hope is the belief that things will get better, that there is a light at the end of the tunnel, and that we have the strength and resilience to overcome the challenges we face.
When we have hope, we are more likely to take positive action to address our problems, rather than becoming overwhelmed and giving up. Hope gives us the energy and motivation to keep going, even when things seem difficult or impossible.
While it's true that some problems in life may not have an easy solution, it's also important to remember that nothing is permanent. Just because we are struggling with something now doesn't mean that we will be struggling with it forever. We may find new solutions or opportunities that we never would have imagined possible.
Similarly, while we may have experienced disappointment or betrayal from people in the past, it's important to remember that there are good people in the world as well. We can choose to focus on the positive relationships in our lives, and to seek out new connections with people who share our values and support us.
Finally, it's important to remember that recovery is possible. While some illnesses may be incurable, medical advances are being made all the time, and new treatments and therapies are constantly being developed. Additionally, even if a cure is not possible, we can still learn to manage our illnesses and lead fulfilling lives.
In conclusion, while life can be full of challenges and difficulties, it's important to maintain hope and focus on the positive possibilities in our lives. With hope, we can overcome even the most difficult challenges and create a brighter future for ourselves.
CHAPTER-7
How to keep your mind peaceful?
Peace of mind is the state of inner tranquility and calmness, where you are free from stress, anxiety, and worries. It is the foundation of a happy and fulfilling life. Without peace of mind, it is difficult to experience true happiness and contentment, even if you have all the material possessions you desire.
Peace of mind is not something that can be bought or acquired through external means. Money, success, and fame do not guarantee peace of mind. In fact, some of the richest and most successful people in the world are known to suffer from mental health issues, stress, and anxiety.
True peace of mind comes from within, and it is the result of a healthy mindset and a positive outlook towards life. It requires an understanding of one's own characteristics, desires, wants, goals, perceptions, and thought patterns. For instance, someone who is content with what they have and focuses on the positive aspects of life is more likely to experience peace of mind than someone who is constantly striving for more and never satisfied.
Achieving peace of mind is a gradual process that involves self-reflection, mindfulness, and conscious effort. You need to identify the factors that cause stress and anxiety in your life and work towards eliminating or reducing them.
Peace of mind is a fundamental aspect of a happy and fulfilling life, and it cannot be acquired through external means. It requires an understanding of one's own mindset, characteristics, desires, wants, goals, perceptions, and thought patterns, and a conscious effort to cultivate a positive outlook towards life.
There are a few ways which could give you peace of your mind:
Being merciful
Being merciful and forgiving towards others is an essential aspect of leading a happy and peaceful life. When someone hurts us with their behavior or words, it can be tempting to react in a vindictive or revengeful manner, seeking to hurt them back. However, this approach is counterproductive and ultimately only leads to more pain and suffering.
Instead of retaliating with hate and negative emotions, it is better to choose forgiveness and mercy. By forgiving those who have hurt us, we release ourselves from the burden of carrying around negative emotions and free ourselves to move on and find peace.
When we hold on to hate and negative emotions, we allow them to consume us, depleting our peace of mind and hindering our ability to experience joy and happiness. In contrast, when we choose forgiveness and mercy, we open ourselves up to positive emotions like love, compassion, and empathy.
Moreover, when we forgive those who have hurt us, we set an example for others to follow, demonstrating the power of mercy and forgiveness to transform relationships and bring about healing. By choosing to act with kindness and compassion towards others, we can create a positive cycle of healing and growth that benefits not only ourselves but also those around us.
In summary, being merciful and forgiving towards others is an essential aspect of leading a happy and peaceful life. By choosing to let go of negative emotions and embrace kindness and compassion, we open ourselves up to positive emotions and set an example for others to follow.
some examples of being merciful:
Example-1: Forgiving someone who hurt you: If someone has wronged you, you can choose to forgive them instead of seeking revenge or holding onto anger. Forgiveness can help you move on and find peace.
Example-2: Showing kindness to those who are unkind: When someone is unkind to you, it can be tempting to respond in kind. However, choosing to show kindness instead can be a powerful way to diffuse the situation and maintain your own sense of inner peace.
Example-3: Helping those in need: Being merciful also means being willing to help those in need, even if they haven't necessarily done anything to help you. Whether it's donating to a charity, volunteering your time, or simply offering a kind word to someone who is struggling, acts of mercy can have a positive impact on both the giver and the recipient.
Example-4: Giving second chances: When someone has made a mistake or wronged you, it can be easy to write them off completely. However, being merciful means being willing to give someone a second chance if they show genuine remorse and a willingness to change.
Stop arguing
Arguments can be very stressful and exhausting, especially if they are intense and prolonged. In such cases, our emotional and mental energy is consumed, and we might experience a loss of peace of mind. Arguments can be with anyone, be it our partner, friend, spouse, colleague, or client. While disagreements and differences of opinion are normal in any relationship, arguments can become counterproductive and result in negative consequences.
When we engage in an argument, we usually want to prove our point, defend our beliefs, or convince the other person of our perspective. However, this can lead to a lot of stress, anxiety, and frustration. Our mind becomes preoccupied with the argument, and we might find it challenging to focus on anything else. This can also lead to physical symptoms such as headaches, nausea, and fatigue.
Instead of arguing and engaging in conflict, it's always better to avoid those people or situations that might trigger such emotions. If we feel that an argument is about to occur, we can try to remain calm and composed and use assertive communication to express our opinions. We can also try to find common ground and compromise if possible. If the situation is beyond repair, it's better to walk away and avoid further conflict.
Arguments can lead to a loss of peace of mind and can be detrimental to our emotional and mental well-being. Therefore, it's always better to avoid them, use assertive communication, and find a peaceful resolution to any conflict.
Here are some examples to illustrate how avoiding arguments can lead to a peaceful mind:
Example-1: A couple has been arguing for hours about who is right and who is wrong, but neither is willing to back down. Instead of continuing the argument, one person decides to take a break and calm down. They come back to the discussion later with a more level-headed approach, and they are able to resolve the issue peacefully.
Example-2: A person is stuck in traffic and becomes frustrated by the slow progress. They start honking their horn and yelling at other drivers, but this only increases their anger and agitation. Instead, they decide to turn on some calming music or a podcast to distract themselves from the traffic and focus on something positive.
Example-3: An employee has a disagreement with their boss about a work assignment. Instead of arguing and insisting on their own way, the employee takes the time to listen to their boss's perspective and consider their ideas. They are able to find a compromise that satisfies both parties and leads to a more peaceful work environment.
Example-4: In each of these examples, avoiding argument and conflict leads to a more peaceful and positive outcome. By choosing to remain calm and not engage in arguments, we can reduce stress and anxiety and maintain a sense of inner peace.
Stop being jealous of people who are better than you:
Jealousy is a common human emotion, but it can have negative effects on our mental and emotional well-being. When we constantly compare ourselves to others and feel envious of their success or accomplishments, it can lead to feelings of inadequacy, low self-esteem, and even depression.
One way to overcome jealousy is to shift our focus from others to ourselves. Instead of comparing ourselves to those who are better than us in certain areas, we can focus on our own unique strengths and talents. We can recognize our own value and worth as individuals, regardless of how we compare to others.
Another way to overcome jealousy is to practice gratitude. Instead of focusing on what we lack or what others have that we don't, we can focus on the blessings and opportunities we have in our own lives. We can cultivate a sense of appreciation and thankfulness for the good things in our lives, no matter how small they may seem.
It's also important to recognize that no one is perfect, and that everyone has flaws and challenges in their lives. When we realize that the people we envy are not perfect and have their own struggles, it can help us feel more compassionate and less envious.
Ultimately, letting go of jealousy requires a shift in mindset and a commitment to focusing on our own growth and happiness. By practicing self-awareness, gratitude, and compassion, we can overcome jealousy and live more peaceful and fulfilling lives.
Here are some examples to illustrate the point:
Example-1: Let's say you are an aspiring musician who has just started learning to play the guitar. You see a famous guitarist on social media who is much better than you and has a huge following. Instead of feeling jealous and discouraged, you should focus on your own progress and enjoy the process of learning. You can even use the success of the famous guitarist as a source of inspiration and motivation to improve your own skills.
Example-2: Another example could be in the workplace. You may have a colleague who seems to be more successful and recognized than you. Instead of feeling jealous and envious, you can try to learn from them and their methods of success. Ask for their advice, observe their work style, and strive to improve your own skills and productivity.
Example-3: In personal relationships, it can be easy to feel jealous of someone who appears to have a more loving and fulfilling relationship than you. Instead of dwelling on those feelings of jealousy, try to focus on your own relationship and what you can do to improve it. Remember that every relationship is unique and has its own challenges, and comparing yourself to others will only lead to negative emotions.
Example-4: Finally, in terms of appearance, it can be easy to feel jealous of someone who seems to have a perfect body or flawless skin. However, it's important to remember that everyone has their own unique features and imperfections. Instead of comparing yourself to others, focus on taking care of your own body and health, and appreciate your own unique beauty.
Help the needy:
Helping the needy is a fundamental aspect of human nature that brings happiness and joy to both the giver and the receiver. The act of giving is one of the most fulfilling experiences that anyone can have. It is an expression of kindness, generosity, and love that can make a significant difference in someone's life. Helping those who are less fortunate than us can give us a sense of purpose and meaning in life.
When we help others, we are expressing our love and compassion for them. We are showing that we care about their well-being and that we are willing to go out of our way to make a difference in their lives. By giving our time, money, or resources to those in need, we are making a positive impact in their lives, and that is a powerful feeling.
Studies have shown that helping others has numerous benefits for our mental health and well-being. When we help others, our brains release feel-good chemicals such as dopamine and oxytocin, which can improve our mood and reduce stress. Moreover, the act of giving can boost our self-esteem and give us a sense of purpose, which can improve our overall quality of life.
Helping the needy is not only a kind and compassionate act but also a way to achieve inner peace and happiness. It is an essential aspect of our humanity that connects us to others and brings us closer to our true selves. So, whenever possible, let us lend a hand to those who are less fortunate and experience the joy and fulfillment that come with giving.
Try to have fewer expectations from this world:
Expectations are a natural part of human life, and we all have them in some form or the other. We set expectations for ourselves and for others, and we expect the world to behave in a certain way. However, having too many expectations can lead to disappointment, frustration, and stress. When we set unrealistic expectations, we are setting ourselves up for failure, and this can have a negative impact on our peace of mind.
It is important to understand that life is not always fair, and things do not always go according to plan. When we set our expectations too high, we are setting ourselves up for disappointment. We may become stressed and anxious when things do not go as planned, and this can lead to a loss of peace of mind. On the other hand, when we have low or no expectations, we are more likely to be pleasantly surprised when things go well, and we are less likely to be disappointed when they don't.
One area where we often have high expectations is in relationships. We expect our partners to fulfill all of our needs and desires, and when they don't, we may become upset or frustrated. It is important to remember that our partners are not mind-readers, and it is unrealistic to expect them to fulfill all of our needs. Instead, we should communicate our needs and expectations clearly and try to compromise with our partners.
Having fewer expectations also means being content with what we have and where we are in life. We often compare ourselves to others and feel like we are lacking in some way. But when we focus on what we have and appreciate it, we are more likely to feel content and at peace.
Having fewer expectations from this world can lead to a greater sense of peace and contentment. We should try to be realistic in our expectations, communicate our needs clearly, and focus on what we have rather than what we lack. By doing so, we can lead a more fulfilling and peaceful life.
Be happy with what you have
Being happy with what you have means finding contentment in your current situation and not constantly seeking more. It's easy to fall into the trap of thinking that having more money, more possessions, or more success will bring us happiness, but this is often not the case. Materialistic possessions can bring us temporary pleasure, but they do not necessarily bring lasting happiness.
Instead of always striving for more, we should learn to appreciate what we already have. This can include our health, our family and friends, our homes, and our jobs. By focusing on the positive aspects of our lives, we can cultivate a sense of gratitude and contentment, which can lead to greater happiness.
It's important to note that being happy with what you have does not mean settling for less or giving up on your goals and aspirations. It simply means finding happiness in the present moment and not constantly seeking more as a means of finding happiness.
Research has shown that people who are happy with what they have are generally more satisfied with their lives and experience greater well-being. This is because they are not constantly chasing after something that they believe will make them happy, but are instead able to find happiness in the here and now.
Stop being egoistic
Ego can be defined as an individual's sense of self-esteem or self-importance. While it can be helpful in boosting confidence and motivation, an excessive or unchecked ego can lead to negative consequences in various aspects of life. This is because when we prioritize our ego, we become overly concerned with our image and how others perceive us, which can lead to negative feelings such as anger, frustration, and dissatisfaction.
One of the main issues with having a strong ego is that it makes us overly sensitive to criticism or rejection. When someone hurts our ego, we may take it as a personal attack and respond defensively or aggressively, leading to conflicts and strained relationships. Additionally, when we focus too much on our ego, we tend to compare ourselves to others, which can lead to feelings of jealousy, envy, and insecurity.
Another issue with having an excessive ego is that it can lead to a preoccupation with material possessions and external validation, rather than focusing on our own internal values and goals. This can lead to a lack of fulfillment and satisfaction, as we become caught up in the pursuit of success and status, rather than finding joy in the simple things in life.
Ultimately, avoiding our ego can lead to a greater sense of peace and contentment in life. Instead of constantly seeking validation and praise from others, we can focus on our own values and goals, and find happiness in the present moment. By recognizing that we are all imperfect beings who are on a journey of growth and self-discovery, we can let go of our need to prove ourselves to others and find peace in being ourselves.
Here's an example:
Let's say you're at work and a colleague makes a comment that you interpret as an insult to your abilities. If you have a strong ego, you might feel the need to defend yourself and prove them wrong. This could lead to an argument or even damage your relationship with that colleague. On the other hand, if you let go of your ego, you might be able to see the comment as an opportunity for growth and improvement. You could respond calmly and with an open mind, asking for feedback and ideas on how to improve. This approach could lead to a more constructive conversation and help you build a better relationship with your colleague.
Become a vegetarian:
"Our mind is like shapeless water, and it acts and transforms based on the circumstances. Our emotions are directly proportional to the food which we consume. Positive feelings include love, happiness, satisfaction, patience, and tolerance, while negative feelings include anger, impatience, dissatisfaction, and hate. Humans have become wild animals, making others hunt flesh for them. Usually, wild animals hunt their food by themselves, but in this era, humans are paying others to hunt or kill for them in the name of business. When we eat meat, we are not only consuming the flesh, but also its suffering, pain, fear, inability, and lack of freedom.
If you want peace in your life, then consider eating a vegetarian diet."
Enjoy the nature of the earth:
Everyone tries to find peace through loud music, illusions, sensuality, people, and money, but few realize that mother nature can offer ultimate peace for the mind. By simply sitting alone and watching the sunrise and sunset or observing the changing clouds in the sky, you can indulge in a calmness that brings true peace.
Meditation:
Meditation involves focusing your mind on the present moment. Regular meditation practice can help you let go of greed, ego, selfishness, cruelty, dissatisfaction, and possessiveness, which are common traits that prevent people from finding true peace in their lives.
If you ask a sanyasi (a person who has renounced the material world) who meditates regularly about their lifestyle, they will likely say that they only expect basic necessities such as food, water, and sleep, rather than desires for various foods or drinks or pleasures that cannot truly satisfy us.
When you let go of greed and selfishness, you can attain a state of inner peace. Many people are constantly striving to satisfy their ego and greed, which can prevent them from experiencing true fulfillment in life. However, when you release these attachments, you can fully enjoy the human experience.
Don’t take too many loans:
Taking loans can be a good way to fulfill our wants and desires. However, it is important to be cautious when taking out loans and to understand the potential consequences. When we borrow money, we are essentially borrowing from our future selves. We will need to repay the loan with interest, which means that we will have less money available to us in the future.
It is important to distinguish between needs and wants when deciding whether to take out a loan. Needs are things that are necessary for our survival or well-being, such as a home, a car, or medical treatment. Wants, on the other hand, are things that we desire but that are not essential to our survival or well-being.
When we take out a loan for a want rather than a need, we are putting ourselves at risk of losing our peace of mind. If we cannot repay the loan, we may experience stress and fear as a result of our financial situation. This can lead to a loss of peace in our lives.
Therefore, it is important to control our desires and to only take out loans for things that are truly necessary. We should also be aware of the risks associated with borrowing money, such as high interest rates and potential difficulties in repaying the loan.
In summary, while loans can be a useful tool for fulfilling our wants and desires, we should be cautious and thoughtful when taking them out. By distinguishing between needs and wants, controlling our desires, and being aware of the risks, we can make informed decisions about borrowing money and maintain our peace of mind.
Stop expecting too much in your life
Everyone has expectations from their partners in relationships, profits from their investments, help from friends and family, and success from their goals. You should be aware of the reality of life and be pragmatic instead of expecting too much from this world. Because this could also lead you to lose peace in your life.
Stop arguing with crazy people
One of the most important things is to stop expecting too much from life. While it is natural to have expectations and aspirations, it is important to be pragmatic and realistic in our approach. Unrealistic expectations can lead to disappointment, frustration, and stress, which can all negatively impact our peace of mind. By being aware of the reality of life, we can manage our expectations and reduce stress.
Have an eight-hour sleep every day
Getting a good night's sleep is also essential for maintaining our peace of mind. Adequate sleep is critical for our physical and mental health, and can help us manage stress and anxiety. It is important to prioritize our sleep and ensure that we get an adequate amount of sleep every night.
Make your living space is calm
Creating a calm and peaceful living space is essential for maintaining our peace of mind. Our living environment plays a significant role in our mental and emotional well-being. By creating a noise-free and peaceful living space, we can reduce stress and create a more conducive environment for relaxation and rest.
Try to be honest
Honesty is an essential trait that can help you live a peaceful life. When you are honest in your communication, profession, and relationships, you are not constantly worried about being caught or exposed. Being dishonest can cause a lot of stress and anxiety, and can ultimately lead to a loss of peace in your life.
In your profession, being dishonest might seem like a quick and easy way to earn more money or get ahead, but it is not a sustainable or ethical way to do business. If you are caught, it can harm your reputation and career in the long run. It is better to be honest with your clients, customers, and colleagues, and earn their trust through your work and honesty.
In relationships, honesty is key to building trust and a strong foundation. If you deceive your partner or cheat on them, it can harm your relationship and lead to a loss of peace in your life. It is always better to be honest with your partner and communicate openly with them about your feelings and desires.
Similarly, in communication, being honest and transparent can help avoid misunderstandings and conflicts. If you are dishonest in your communication, it can harm your relationships and lead to a loss of peace in your life. Therefore, it is important to be truthful in your communication and express your thoughts and feelings clearly.
Overall, being honest in all aspects of your life can help you live a peaceful and fulfilling life. It might not always be easy, but it is worth it in the long run.
CHAPTER- 8
How to stop distractions?
Distractions could disturb our focus or they could deviate us in another direction in our life. But only a few people identify their distractions and rectify them and continue on their path. Most people fail to identify the reason behind their distractions and become a victim.
Whether you could be a student or a professional, you still could lose your direction or your duty. The distractions are two types, one is internal distractions and another is external distractions. Among these, external distractions could be identified easily but whereas, the internal distractions are hard to identify. Unless you have a deep observation of your emotions and thoughts.
1.Internal distractions:
Internal distractions are those which are being produced from your mind and not by the outside world. These distractions could block your concentration or focus on a particular thing. The internal distractions could be about your past experiences, incidents, or future possibilities of an issue in your life, or they could be unnecessary fears. Your mind often tries to bring these internal distractions when you require the concentration. With these internal distractions, you not only lose your focus, but also you could lose your confidence due to your lack of focus. Internal distractions are very common in many, usually, most of us get around a few thousands of thoughts every day without our consent. With these kinds of internal distractions, there are chances that your decision-making could become slow or your memory could become weak.
Here are some examples of internal distractions:
Daydreaming: When our thoughts wander, and we become lost in our own imagination or unrelated thoughts, it can divert our attention from the present task.
Stress and worry: Excessive worrying or feeling overwhelmed by stress can occupy our mind, making it difficult to concentrate on the task at hand.
Negative self-talk: Engaging in self-criticism, self-doubt, or negative thoughts can create mental distractions and undermine confidence and focus.
Lack of motivation:
When we lack interest or motivation in a task, it becomes challenging to stay focused and engaged.
Emotional states: Strong emotions such as anger, sadness, or excitement can disrupt concentration and divert attention away from the task.
Multitasking: Trying to juggle multiple tasks simultaneously can lead to divided attention and reduce overall focus and effectiveness.
Lack of organization: Mental clutter, disorganization, or an unclear plan can create internal distractions as our minds struggle to prioritize and stay on track.
Physical discomfort: Discomfort, such as hunger, fatigue, or physical pain, can occupy our thoughts and disrupt concentration.
Few ways to control your internal distractions:
We should start living in the present
Living in the present means being mindful of your current moment and being fully engaged with your surroundings and activities. It is about giving your undivided attention to the task at hand and experiencing it fully without being distracted by thoughts about the past or worries about the future. By living in the present, you can enjoy each moment and make the most of your time.
When we focus too much on the future, we tend to worry and become anxious about what may happen. This can cause us to lose sight of the present and miss out on opportunities or experiences that are right in front of us. Similarly, when we dwell too much on the past, we may feel regret or guilt, which can also distract us from our current situation.
By focusing on the present, we can reduce our distractions and increase our productivity. When we give our full attention to the task at hand, we are more likely to complete it efficiently and effectively. Moreover, by being mindful of our present moment, we can become more aware of our thoughts and feelings, which can help us manage our emotions and reduce stress.
To start living in the present, you can practice mindfulness techniques such as meditation, deep breathing, or yoga. These practices can help you become more aware of your thoughts and feelings and help you stay focused on the present moment. Additionally, you can try to eliminate unnecessary distractions such as social media or multitasking, and focus on one task at a time.
Start liking your work
When you enjoy doing something, you tend to put more effort and time into it without feeling tired or bored. This is because when you like or love something, it automatically becomes interesting and engaging for you. On the other hand, when you don't like something, even the simplest tasks can become a chore and feel like a burden.
In the context of work, it is important to like what you are doing to increase your motivation, engagement, and productivity. When you like your work, you tend to give it your best, and this ultimately leads to better results and success. Moreover, when you like your work, you tend to feel a sense of purpose and satisfaction, which can also lead to better mental health and well-being.
However, it is not always possible to choose a job or work that you love or like. In such cases, you can try to find aspects of the job that you enjoy or find meaning in. You can also try to develop an interest in the work or task by learning more about it or finding its relevance to your personal goals and values.
It is important to like or find meaning in your work to achieve long-term success. This helps you to stay motivated and focused, leading to better results and ultimately, greater satisfaction and happiness.
Start taking short naps
Taking short naps during the day is a great way to give your mind a break and recharge yourself. It is a well-known fact that sleep helps to improve cognitive function, memory, and mood. Short naps during the day can help you to relax and reduce stress, which can ultimately improve your productivity and focus.
When you take a short nap, your mind enters a state of relaxation and allows your subconscious to process and organize thoughts and memories. This can help to clear your mind of any distractions or negative thoughts that may be causing internal distractions.
Moreover, short naps have been shown to improve cognitive performance and increase alertness. It can also help to reduce fatigue and improve mood, which can ultimately lead to increased productivity and motivation.
It's important to note that taking long naps during the day may disrupt your sleep pattern and leave you feeling groggy or tired, so it's best to limit your naps to around 10-15 minutes.
In conclusion, taking short naps during the day is a great way to recharge yourself and give your mind a break from any internal distractions. This can ultimately lead to increased productivity and improved overall well-being.
Try to take good vitamins every day
Vitamins are organic compounds that are essential for various metabolic functions in the body. They are required in small amounts, but their absence can lead to a range of health problems. Vitamins play a crucial role in maintaining good health and well-being.
When we talk about the relationship between vitamins and mental health, research has shown that certain vitamins have a positive impact on the brain's function and mood. For example, vitamin B6 is known to help the body produce serotonin, a neurotransmitter that helps regulate mood, while vitamin B12 helps to maintain healthy nerve cells and red blood cells, and also plays a role in producing serotonin.
Other vitamins that are important for mental health include vitamin D, which has been linked to a range of mood disorders, including depression, and vitamin C, which helps to reduce oxidative stress and inflammation, both of which are linked to depression and anxiety.
Taking a daily multivitamin that contains a range of essential vitamins and minerals can help to ensure that you are getting all the nutrients your body needs to function optimally. However, it is important to remember that vitamins should not be seen as a replacement for a healthy and balanced diet. Eating a variety of nutrient-rich foods, such as fruits, vegetables, whole grains, lean proteins, and healthy fats, is the best way to ensure that you are getting all the vitamins and minerals your body needs to function at its best.
Taking good vitamins every day can help to ensure that you are getting all the essential nutrients your body needs to function optimally, which in turn can have a positive impact on your mental health and well-being. However, it is important to remember that a healthy and balanced diet is the best way to ensure that you are getting all the vitamins and minerals your body needs.
Check your pulse rate
Our pulse rate refers to the number of times our heart beats per minute. It is a measure of how fast our heart is working to pump blood throughout our body. The normal pulse rate for adults ranges from 60 to 100 beats per minute. However, there are several factors that can affect our pulse rate, including physical activity, stress, illness, and medication.
As mentioned in the statement, our thoughts are directly proportional to our heart pulse rate. This means that our emotional state can affect our pulse rate. For example, when we experience fear, our body goes into a state of alertness, causing our heart rate to increase. Similarly, when we experience stress or anxiety, our heart rate may also increase. This is because our body is preparing to respond to a potential threat or danger.
Therefore, checking our pulse rate can be a useful tool in monitoring our emotional state. If we notice any unusual changes in our heart rate, such as a sudden increase or decrease, it could be a sign of an underlying health issue. It is important to consult a doctor if we notice any persistent fluctuations in our pulse rate, as it could be a symptom of a heart condition or other health problems.
In summary, checking our pulse rate can be a helpful way to monitor our emotional and physical health. By keeping an eye on our pulse rate and seeking medical attention, if necessary, we can take steps to ensure that we maintain good overall health and well-being.
Start doing yoga or meditation
Your past and future thoughts and unnecessary imaginations or fears are due to a lack of focus. So, you should train your mind to focus on something, like on your breath or mantras.
Start playing music or learning music every day
Playing or learning music every day can have a significant impact on reducing internal distractions and improving mental health. Music has been shown to have a therapeutic effect on the mind and body. When we play or listen to music, it activates the pleasure centers in our brain and releases endorphins, which are natural mood boosters.
Furthermore, learning or playing music requires focus and concentration, which can help to shift our attention away from negative thoughts and distractions. It can also improve our memory and cognitive function, as well as enhance our creativity and problem-solving skills.
Additionally, playing or learning music can provide a sense of accomplishment and self-esteem, which can be beneficial in reducing anxiety and depression. It can also serve as a form of stress relief, allowing us to relax and unwind from the pressures of daily life.
In conclusion, incorporating music into our daily routine can have numerous benefits for our mental and emotional well-being. Whether it's playing an instrument, singing, or simply listening to music, it can help to reduce internal distractions and promote a sense of calm and focus.
2. External distractions
External distractions refer to stimuli or factors in the environment that divert or interrupt our attention from the task at hand. These distractions can come from various sources and can significantly impact our focus, productivity, and overall performance. Here are some common examples of external distractions:
Noise: Loud or constant noise, such as conversations, traffic, construction work, or even music, can be distracting and make it challenging to concentrate on a task.
Visual distractions: Bright lights, cluttered or visually stimulating environments, moving objects, or people passing by can draw our attention away from what we're doing.
Interruptions: Phone calls, text messages, instant notifications, emails, or colleagues interrupting us for questions or discussions can break our concentration and disrupt workflow.
Environmental factors: Uncomfortable temperatures, poor lighting, uncomfortable furniture, or an uncomfortable workspace can cause discomfort and distract us from our work.
Technology: Social media, online browsing, gaming, or other digital distractions can be tempting and divert our attention away from important tasks.
Meetings and discussions: Frequent meetings, lengthy discussions, or colleagues engaging in conversations nearby can be disruptive and make it challenging to maintain focus.
Personal interactions: Colleagues or friends engaging in conversations nearby, phone calls, or unexpected visitors can divert our attention and disrupt our workflow.
Background distractions: Background music, TV, or conversations within earshot can be distracting, particularly if they are unrelated to the task at hand.
Few ways to control your external distractions:
External distractions refer to the stimuli that are present in the environment around us that can disrupt our attention, focus, and productivity. These distractions can come in various forms such as noise, visual distractions, social media notifications, emails, phone calls, and other forms of interruptions that can divert our attention away from the task at hand. External distractions are more dangerous than internal distractions as they are often unpredictable and can quickly take us away from our goals and objectives without us even realizing it. Therefore, it is important to take necessary measures to prevent external distractions and stay focused on our work or goals.
Mobiles phones
In today's world, mobile phones have become an integral part of our lives, and they provide easy access to information, communication, and entertainment. However, excessive use of mobile phones, especially certain apps, can lead to addiction, which can be a major external distraction. Apps like dating apps, messaging apps, or game apps are becoming a big distraction for everyone, and people can easily get addicted to them.
Addiction to these apps can lead to problematic situations, and it's not just the app developers who are responsible for this. The problem lies within the individual and their low self-control. It's essential to control your mind and use your mobile phone based on regular schedules to avoid becoming addicted to these apps.
The first step to controlling your mobile phone usage is to make a schedule and use it only at that particular time. Avoid using your mobile phone when your mind is wavering or when you're free of work or in a mood swing. It's also important to avoid carrying your mobile phone with you when you're at home, and try to stay away from it. Instead of relying on your mobile phone, try to read books or talk to people face to face.
It's crucial to remember that mobile phones are a tool that can make our lives easier, but it's important to use them wisely and avoid becoming addicted to them. By controlling our usage, we can reduce external distractions and improve our focus and productivity.
Addictions
Addictions can have serious negative impacts on an individual's life, relationships, and health. Hence, it's important to take steps to prevent oneself from getting addicted. Here are some ways to prevent addictions:
Stay away from people who have addictions: People who have addictions often encourage others to initiate those addictions. Hence, it's better to avoid such company and stay with people who have healthy habits.
Be aware of the consequences: Addictions are never a solution to any problem, and they can cause serious harm to an individual's life. Be aware of the negative consequences of addictions and understand that they are not fashionable, but are harmful.
Develop healthy habits: One of the best ways to prevent addictions is to develop healthy habits. Engage in physical activities, eat healthy food, and practice stress management techniques like meditation or yoga. These activities can help you feel good about yourself and reduce the chances of getting addicted to harmful substances or behaviors.
Seek professional help: If you are already struggling with an addiction, seek professional help as soon as possible. Addiction is a serious issue that requires professional guidance and support to overcome.
Stay motivated: Staying motivated and focused on your goals can help you prevent addictions. Set small goals for yourself and work towards achieving them. Celebrate your successes and stay committed to your goals. With time, you will develop a strong willpower and the ability to resist temptations.
Even relationships could be a distraction
It is important to understand that while relationships can bring joy and happiness in our lives, they can also become a distraction if we become too invested in them or prioritize them over our personal goals and aspirations. This is particularly important in today's highly competitive world where we need to focus on achieving our goals and ambitions in order to succeed.
One of the main ways in which relationships can become a distraction is when we become over-possessive, obsessive, or insecure about our partners. These negative behaviors can take up a lot of mental and emotional energy, making it difficult to focus on anything else. Additionally, if we prioritize our relationships over our personal goals, we may end up neglecting our own needs and desires, leading to feelings of frustration and dissatisfaction.
In order to prevent relationships from becoming a distraction, it is important to be practical and manage them in a healthy way. This means avoiding negative behaviors like possessiveness, obsession, and insecurity, and instead focusing on building a relationship that is based on trust, respect, and mutual support. It also means being aware of our priorities and making sure that we are not neglecting our personal goals and aspirations in favor of our relationships.
For example, if we have an important exam coming up, we may need to limit the amount of time we spend talking to our partner in order to focus on studying. This does not mean that we do not care about our partner or our relationship, but rather that we are aware of our priorities and are taking steps to achieve our goals.
Ultimately, the key to preventing relationships from becoming a distraction is to maintain a healthy balance between our personal goals and our relationships. By being aware of our priorities and managing our relationships in a healthy way, we can enjoy the benefits of both without becoming overly invested in either one.
Multitasking
It is a common habit that many people believe they are good at. However, studies have shown that our brains aren't actually designed to handle multiple tasks simultaneously. When we try to multitask, our attention and focus get divided, and we end up doing each task poorly or incompletely.
Trying to do multiple things at the same time is a form of external distraction that can prevent us from achieving our goals. It can also lead to stress, burnout, and a sense of overwhelm. In fact, studies have shown that people who multitask on a regular basis tend to be less productive and have a lower overall cognitive performance compared to those who focus on one task at a time.
To avoid external distractions caused by multitasking, it's important to prioritize your tasks and focus on one thing at a time. This means avoiding distractions like checking your phone, responding to emails, or engaging in other activities while you're trying to work on a task.
When you're working on a particular task, try to eliminate all other distractions and focus only on that task. For example, if you're writing an important report, turn off your phone and log out of your social media accounts so that you're not tempted to check them. If you're in a meeting, put away your laptop and give your full attention to the conversation.
By focusing on one task at a time, you can give your brain the time and space it needs to concentrate fully on the task at hand. This can help you to work more efficiently and effectively, and to achieve better results in less time. Additionally, when you're not distracted by multiple tasks, you may find that you feel more energized and less stressed, which can help you to stay motivated and focused in the long run.
Conclusion
All the distractions mentioned above, along with their remedies, are for those who lack control over their emotions, and not for those who have good self-control towards distractions. Some people say that all entertainment and fun are distractions, but I disagree. Unless you have control over them, nothing can distract you. Have you ever heard that a CEO, a billionaire, a highly intelligent person, a famous actor, or a big leader is addicted to something or distracted? No, right? It's because they know when and how to pull or push themselves towards addictions or entertainment. They have enormous control over their emotions and can restrict themselves without becoming addicted, giving higher priority to their work.
CHAPTER-9
How to improve your intelligence?
Intelligence can be defined as the ability to acquire, understand, and apply knowledge and skills to solve problems, make decisions, and adapt to new situations. It involves not only cognitive abilities such as reasoning, memory, and perception but also emotional intelligence, social intelligence, and practical intelligence. Intelligence is not fixed and can be developed through education, experience, and deliberate effort. It is a crucial factor in personal and professional success, and plays a significant role in various areas of life such as academic achievement, career advancement, and social relationships.
Here are some different types of intelligence:
Logical-mathematical intelligence: The ability to reason, calculate, and think logically, as well as understand complex ideas and patterns. Examples of people with high logical-mathematical intelligence include mathematicians, scientists, and engineers.
Verbal-linguistic intelligence: The ability to use language effectively, both written and spoken. Examples of people with high verbal-linguistic intelligence include writers, poets, journalists, and public speakers.
Spatial intelligence: The ability to think in three dimensions and understand spatial relationships. Examples of people with high spatial intelligence include architects, artists, and pilots.
Bodily-kinesthetic intelligence: The ability to use your body in skilled ways, such as in sports, dance, or surgery. Examples of people with high bodily-kinesthetic intelligence include athletes, dancers, and surgeons.
Musical intelligence: The ability to understand and create music. Examples of people with high musical intelligence include composers, singers, and musicians.
Interpersonal intelligence: The ability to understand and relate to others, and to work effectively in groups. Examples of people with high interpersonal intelligence include counselors, teachers, and politicians.
Intrapersonal intelligence: The ability to understand and manage one's own emotions, thoughts, and motivations. Examples of people with high intrapersonal intelligence include psychologists, philosophers, and spiritual leaders.
Naturalist intelligence: The ability to understand and appreciate the natural world. Examples of people with high naturalist intelligence include biologists, environmentalists, and farmers.
Few ways to improve your intelligence:
Read a newspaper every day
Reading the newspaper every day can be an excellent habit to cultivate, as it can offer a variety of benefits. Firstly, it helps you stay updated on current affairs, which is an essential aspect of being an informed citizen. Knowing what is happening around you can help you make informed decisions and participate in discussions and debates that affect society.
Secondly, reading the newspaper regularly can improve your knowledge of various subjects like politics, economics, business, and sports. This knowledge can come in handy when you need to make decisions or solve problems related to these areas.
Thirdly, the newspaper can offer insights into different mindsets and opinions prevalent in society. It can help you understand how people think and react to various events and issues, which can help you develop a more empathetic and nuanced view of the world.
Finally, reading the newspaper regularly can help you avoid being deceived by scams or frauds. By keeping up with the latest news and being aware of current issues, you can better judge whether something is genuine or fake.
In addition to these benefits, reading the newspaper regularly can also improve your vocabulary, critical thinking skills, and overall cognitive function. It can help you stay mentally sharp and informed, which is essential in today's fast-paced and ever-changing world.
It is important to note, however, that not all news sources are reliable or unbiased. Therefore, it is essential to read from credible sources and verify information before making conclusions or decisions. Overall, reading the newspaper every day can be an excellent habit to develop, as it offers numerous benefits that can improve your personal and professional life.
Try to involve in your family’s responsibilities or problems
When you involve yourself in your family's responsibilities or problems, you are not only helping your family, but you are also helping yourself to become more mature and responsible. By taking on responsibilities within your family, you will develop a sense of accountability, which will transfer into other aspects of your life, such as your work or relationships.
Involving yourself in your family's problems means that you are actively trying to help your family overcome any issues they may be facing. This can include financial issues, emotional issues, or any other problem that may arise. By working to help solve these problems, you will develop problem-solving skills, empathy, and a sense of responsibility.
Similarly, involving yourself in your family's responsibilities means that you are taking an active role in helping your family run smoothly. This can include taking care of younger siblings, helping with household chores, or assisting with your family's business. By taking on these responsibilities, you will develop time management skills, leadership skills, and a sense of discipline.
Overall, involving yourself in your family's responsibilities or problems is a great way to become more mature and responsible. It will help you develop skills that will benefit you in other aspects of your life, such as your work or relationships. Additionally, it will strengthen your bond with your family and make you feel more connected to them.
Improve your observation
Observation is an important skill that allows us to gather information about the world around us. It involves paying attention to details, noticing patterns and connections, and using all of our senses to gain a better understanding of what is happening. Improving your observation skills can help you make better decisions, solve problems more effectively, and communicate more clearly.
One way to improve your observation skills is to develop a habit of being curious about the world. This means asking questions about everything you encounter, even things that might seem mundane or unimportant. For example, if you're walking down the street, you might ask yourself why certain buildings are designed the way they are, what kinds of plants are growing in the area, or why people are behaving in a certain way.
Another technique for improving your observation skills is to practice mindfulness. This involves focusing your attention on the present moment and being fully aware of your thoughts, feelings, and surroundings. Mindfulness can help you notice details that you might otherwise miss, such as the sound of a bird chirping or the way the light reflects off a window.
When observing something, it's important to use all of your senses. This means not only looking at something but also listening, touching, smelling, and even tasting it if appropriate. For example, if you're observing a piece of fruit, you might look at its color and texture, feel its weight and shape, smell its aroma, and taste its flavor.
Finally, it's important to avoid making assumptions or jumping to conclusions based on incomplete information. Instead, try to remain open-minded and gather as much information as possible before coming to any conclusions. This can help you avoid biases and make more accurate observations.
Start doing creative work
Creativity is a powerful tool that allows individuals to express their thoughts and ideas freely. Creative work is any task or activity that involves using one's imagination and originality to create something new and innovative. Engaging in creative work can provide numerous benefits, including improved problem-solving skills, increased self-awareness, and a sense of accomplishment and fulfillment.
Many people are limited in their creativity because they are confined to strict guidelines and rules in their jobs or studies. They are given tasks that must be completed in a specific way and are not allowed to deviate from the established norms. This can lead to a lack of motivation and a feeling of being unfulfilled.
By engaging in creative work, individuals can break free from the restrictions of their daily tasks and express themselves in unique and original ways. Creative work allows individuals to tap into their subconscious mind and unleash their full potential. It provides a platform for exploring new ideas and concepts, and encourages individuals to take risks and try new things.
Engaging in creative work also has a positive impact on other areas of life. It can improve problem-solving skills and increase critical thinking abilities, allowing individuals to approach challenges in new and innovative ways. Creative work can also improve communication skills, as individuals learn how to express themselves more effectively and clearly.
Highly intelligent people often attribute their success to their creativity. They are able to come up with new ideas and innovative solutions to complex problems, which allows them to stand out in their fields. By engaging in creative work, individuals can unlock their full potential and tap into their inner creativity, leading to increased success and fulfillment in all areas of life.
Try to learn as much as you can
Continuous learning is an important aspect of personal growth and development. It involves actively seeking out new knowledge and skills, and embracing opportunities for growth and improvement. Learning can take many forms, from formal education and training programs to informal self-directed study and exploration.
Learning a new language, upgrading your work skills, or acquiring new skills can provide numerous benefits. It can increase your marketability in the job market, improve your earning potential, and expand your professional network. Learning can also improve your cognitive abilities, including memory, attention, and problem-solving skills.
To be a successful learner, it is important to keep your ego aside and be open to new ideas and perspectives. No one knows everything, and the world is constantly changing, so it is essential to embrace new knowledge and skills in order to stay relevant and competitive. This means being willing to ask questions, seek feedback, and accept constructive criticism in order to improve.
Continuous learning also involves developing a growth mindset, which is the belief that your abilities and intelligence can be developed through hard work, practice, and dedication. This mindset encourages individuals to embrace challenges and see failures as opportunities for growth and improvement.
Learning can take many forms, including formal education and training programs, online courses and tutorials, self-directed study and exploration, and mentoring and coaching. It is important to find the learning methods that work best for you and to remain committed to your learning goals.
Try to learn the psychology of human
If you are aware of the psychology of humans then you can solve 90% of your problems in your life or career. Because when you know about the thinking and behavior of humans, then you can either change them according to or you could change yourself according to the circumstances. Learning human psychology is very necessary these days because it could be helpful for you in dealing with your clients or competitors or strangers. And for the sake of learning, you need to read books or observe the people around you. You can slowly start observing when you are watching Tv shows or movies or fiction novels and in later stages by observing people around you.
Improve your visual ability by reading fiction books
The ability to visualize is an important aspect of personal development and success. When we are able to visualize our goals and desires, we are better able to create a roadmap for achieving them. Visualization also helps to keep us motivated and focused on our goals, even in the face of obstacles and challenges.
Reading fiction books can be a great way to improve your visual ability. When we read fiction, we are transported to a different world, where we can visualize the characters, settings, and events in our minds. This mental exercise can help to improve our ability to visualize and imagine, which can be beneficial for achieving our goals.
In addition to improving our visual ability, reading fiction has numerous other benefits. It can help to reduce stress, improve empathy and social skills, and increase our overall knowledge and vocabulary. Reading also provides a form of entertainment and relaxation, which can be a great way to unwind after a long day.
To get the most out of reading fiction, it is important to choose books that align with your interests and goals. Whether you enjoy science fiction, romance, or mystery, there are countless books to choose from that can help to improve your visual ability and stimulate your imagination.
Talk to many people as you can
There might be only seven emotions in humans but everyone thinks differently in different circumstances. When you talk to many people in your daily life, you can learn about different characteristics of people, as well as the knowledge and problems which they have. By doing this, you are not only gaining others' knowledge but also their intelligence and wisdom too.
Start observing your emotions
Our emotions are a powerful tool that can greatly impact our thoughts, actions, and overall well-being. When we are able to observe our emotions, we gain a deeper understanding of ourselves and the world around us. This allows us to better manage our emotions, solve problems, and learn from our mistakes.
Observing our emotions involves becoming aware of our thoughts and feelings, and how they influence each other. For example, if we are feeling angry or frustrated, we can take a step back and observe why we are feeling this way. Is it because of something someone said or did? Is it because of our own expectations or beliefs? By understanding the root cause of our emotions, we can better manage them and respond in a more productive and positive way.
Observing our emotions can also help us solve problems. When we are faced with a challenge or obstacle, we may feel overwhelmed or uncertain about how to proceed. By observing our emotions, we can identify any limiting beliefs or negative thought patterns that may be holding us back. We can then work to reframe our thinking and approach the problem in a more effective way.
Finally, observing our emotions allows us to learn from our mistakes. We all make mistakes in life, but it is how we respond to them that determines our growth and success. By observing our emotions in the aftermath of a mistake, we can identify any areas where we may need to improve or adjust our behavior. This can help us to avoid making the same mistake in the future and to continue growing and learning.
Play games that make you think
Playing games that make you think is an excellent way to improve your cognitive skills and mental abilities. Unlike games that only provide temporary enjoyment, such as action or adventure games, games that require problem-solving and critical thinking skills can have long-lasting benefits for your brain.
One example of such games is Chess. Chess is a game that requires strategic planning, decision making, and critical thinking skills. Playing chess regularly can improve your cognitive abilities, including memory, concentration, and problem-solving skills. It can also help improve your creativity and enhance your ability to think abstractly.
Another game that can improve your cognitive skills is Sudoku. Sudoku is a game that involves numbers and requires logical thinking and problem-solving skills. Playing Sudoku regularly can help improve your memory, concentration, and problem-solving abilities.
Puzzle games are another great way to exercise your brain. These games require problem-solving skills, critical thinking, and spatial awareness. There are many different types of puzzle games available, including jigsaw puzzles, crossword puzzles, and logic puzzles. Playing these games can help improve your memory, concentration, and problem-solving skills.
Word games are another excellent option for those looking to improve their cognitive abilities. Word games, such as Scrabble or Word Search, require knowledge of vocabulary and spelling, as well as critical thinking and problem-solving skills.
Always try to understand what you are doing
Understanding what you are doing is crucial to achieve success and gain knowledge. It involves paying attention to details, analyzing and comprehending information, and making connections between different concepts. When you take the time to understand what you are doing, you will be able to comprehend the purpose and goals of your actions, and how they relate to the bigger picture.
For example, if you are working on a project, you may be given a set of instructions or guidelines to follow. While it may be tempting to simply follow the steps without thinking about why you are doing them, taking the time to understand the instructions will help you to better understand the objectives of the project, and how your work fits into the overall plan.
Similarly, if you are studying a subject, it's important to not just memorize the facts and figures, but to understand the underlying concepts and principles. This will help you to make connections between different ideas and apply your knowledge to different situations.
When you truly understand what you are doing, you can also improve your critical thinking skills. You will be able to analyze information and make informed decisions based on your understanding of the subject matter. This is important in many areas of life, such as in the workplace, in personal relationships, and in decision making.
Overall, taking the time to understand what you are doing is a key element in improving your knowledge, skills, and intelligence. It will help you to gain a deeper understanding of the world around you and lead to greater success in all aspects of your life.
Improve your five senses:
While humans have been endowed with five primary senses - sight, hearing, touch, taste, and smell - the depth of our intelligence and understanding can indeed be greatly influenced by how effectively we utilize and enhance these senses. Let's delve into each sense and explore how improving them can lead to greater intelligence and success:
Sight (Vision): Our sense of sight is incredibly powerful, allowing us to perceive and interpret the visual world around us. By enhancing this sense, we can gather a wealth of information and insights. For instance, consider a scientist studying the stars. With a sharper sense of sight, they can observe faint celestial objects, discover new phenomena, and contribute to the advancement of astronomy. Similarly, a keen eye for detail can help a detective solve complex cases by spotting subtle clues that others might miss.
Hearing (Audition): A refined sense of hearing can lead to improved communication, empathy, and overall understanding. Imagine a musician with exceptional hearing, able to discern even the subtlest nuances of sound. This skill could lead to the creation of innovative compositions that resonate deeply with audiences. In a broader context, a skilled negotiator with acute listening abilities can detect underlying emotions and motives during discussions, enabling them to reach mutually beneficial agreements.
Touch (Tactile Sensation): Our sense of touch is closely tied to our emotional experiences and cognitive development. Someone who hones their sense of touch, like a skilled masseuse, can offer therapeutic relief to individuals in pain, enhancing their well-being. Additionally, a talented artist who sculpts with their hands can bring intricate visions to life through tactile exploration and manipulation of materials.
Taste (Gustation): While taste is often associated with the pleasures of dining, it's also an avenue for developing intelligence. A skilled chef, for instance, can blend flavors in innovative ways, creating unique culinary experiences. This expertise not only leads to gastronomic success but can also contribute to the understanding of cultural traditions and the chemistry of food components.
Smell (Olfaction): The sense of smell is intricately linked to memory and emotional responses. Enhancing this sense can lead to improved cognitive connections and insights. A skilled sommelier, with a finely tuned sense of smell, can identify intricate aromas in wines, providing a deeper appreciation of their qualities. Furthermore, a trained perfumer can create fragrances that evoke specific emotions or memories, illustrating the powerful influence of smell on our mental state.
Incorporating all these senses into your learning and observation process can indeed make you wiser and more successful. Consider an individual who practices mindfulness meditation, engaging all their senses to fully experience the present moment. By sharpening their senses, they heighten their awareness and develop a deeper understanding of their surroundings, leading to improved decision-making and a more profound connection to the world.
In summary, the refinement of our senses goes beyond basic perception; it involves active engagement, exploration, and training. By enhancing our ability to observe, interpret, and learn from our sensory experiences, we can unlock a wealth of knowledge, creativity, and intelligence that contributes to our personal and professional growth.
Conclusion
In today's society, people often judge others based on their academic or professional achievements. This can put a lot of pressure on individuals who might not have excelled in these areas. However, it's important to remember that intelligence is not solely determined by these factors.
By focusing on improving your intelligence through various techniques such as learning new skills, reading, observing emotions, and playing games that make you think, you are investing in yourself and your future. It's important to not let others' opinions or judgments affect your own self-worth and perception of intelligence.
Everyone has their own unique journey and path in life, and just because someone might not have achieved certain academic or professional success doesn't mean they aren't intelligent or capable of achieving great things. It's important to stay true to yourself and focus on your own growth and development rather than comparing yourself to others.
Don't let others' views and opinions about intelligence define your own self-worth. Focus on improving yourself through various techniques and trust that your efforts will lead to success in your own unique way.
CHAPTER-10
How to improve your self-confidence?
Self-confidence is a crucial aspect of personal and professional development. It is an inner belief that you can achieve your goals and succeed in whatever you do. People with high self-confidence are more likely to take risks, seize opportunities, and overcome obstacles. They are better equipped to handle stress and pressure, communicate effectively, and build relationships.
Having self-confidence means having faith in your abilities, strengths, and values. It means being aware of your limitations and shortcomings but not letting them define you or hold you back. Self-confidence is not the same as arrogance or overconfidence, which can be detrimental to your relationships and reputation. It is about being humble and open to feedback, but also firm in your beliefs and convictions.
Having self-confidence is crucial because it affects how one sees oneself and how others perceive them. A confident person is more likely to take risks, try new things, and pursue their goals with determination and enthusiasm.
In professional life, self-confidence is a valuable asset. It enables one to take on new challenges, handle difficult situations, and present oneself effectively to clients, colleagues, and investors. Confidence in one's abilities can help in negotiations, public speaking, and leadership roles. It can also lead to better decision-making, as confident individuals are more likely to trust their instincts and take calculated risks.
In personal life, self-confidence is equally important. It helps in building new relationships and maintaining existing ones. A confident person is more likely to approach a potential partner, initiate conversations, and express themselves openly. Confidence can also improve one's social skills and help in creating a positive first impression.
However, it is important to note that self-confidence should not be confused with arrogance or overconfidence. It is crucial to strike a balance between confidence and humility, and not let one's confidence turn into a sense of superiority over others. Confidence should be based on one's own abilities and achievements, not on comparisons with others.
Here are some examples:
Professional Life:
Imagine you have to present a business plan to potential investors. If you lack self-confidence, you may stumble over your words or doubt the validity of your plan, which could cause the investors to lose faith in you and your idea. However, if you have confidence in yourself and your plan, you'll be able to deliver a convincing pitch and secure funding for your business.
Personal Life:
Let's say you want to ask someone out on a date. If you lack self-confidence, you may hesitate and doubt your own worthiness, which could lead to missed opportunities for connection and romance. On the other hand, if you approach the person with confidence and a positive attitude, you're more likely to make a good impression and potentially build a strong relationship.
Academic Life:
Suppose you have to give a presentation in front of your class. If you lack self-confidence, you may struggle with stage fright or worry that your presentation won't be good enough. This can lead to a lackluster performance and lower grades. But if you approach the presentation with confidence and preparedness, you're more likely to engage your audience and earn a better grade.
In all of these scenarios, having self-confidence can make a big difference in your success and overall well-being.
The following are a few methods to gain confidence in you:
Never find your confidence in others
Never seek your confidence in others. If you lack confidence in yourself or your skills, don’t ask others about yourself because no one knows you better than yourself. Asking for others’ opinions might lead to demotivation or loss of self-confidence, as some people may intentionally bring you down. This applies not only to asking about your skills but also to sharing your pictures online. If you post a picture on social media, don’t rely on likes or comments to boost your confidence. These days, even a lunatic can get likes and comments. Instead, look at yourself in the mirror and judge yourself. Build your confidence in your skills and stop depending on others.
Lack of confidence arises when you have less knowledge
Lack of confidence arises when you have less knowledge. Let’s say that you have thoroughly read yesterday’s newspaper. Would you ask others for confirmation of the news? Of course not! Because you have gained knowledge by yourself without relying on others. In the same way, if you have sound knowledge of your task or work, then you will not have to rely on the judgments of others. By doing this, you can gain a lot of confidence in yourself.
I still remember when one of my friends, who had less business knowledge but was ambitious to become a successful businessman, asked me whether he could become one after the debacle of his first business.
Your failures could make you lose self-confidence
Experiencing failure is an inevitable part of life. It is common for individuals to encounter setbacks or experience disappointments at some point in their lives. However, continuous failure can lead to self-doubt, decreased motivation, and a loss of self-confidence. It can also cause stress and anxiety, which may further hinder a person's ability to succeed.
It is important to understand that failure is not a reflection of one's worth or ability. It is simply an indication that something needs to be improved or a different approach needs to be taken. It is essential to take failures as opportunities to learn and grow, rather than letting them crush your self-confidence.
In order to maintain self-confidence in the face of failure, it is important to focus on your strengths and accomplishments. Remind yourself of the times when you succeeded and how you overcame obstacles. Recognize that setbacks are temporary and can be overcome with perseverance and determination.
Here are some examples:
Example-1: An entrepreneur who has launched a new startup may face several failures before achieving success. These failures could lead to self-doubt and loss of confidence. However, if the entrepreneur has faith in their skills and continues to work hard, they can overcome these failures and eventually succeed.
Example-2: A student who is struggling to pass an exam may feel demotivated and lose confidence in their abilities. However, if the student seeks help, studies harder, and maintains a positive attitude, they can improve their performance and regain their confidence.
Example-3: A performer who has had a bad show or received negative reviews may feel discouraged and lose confidence in their abilities. However, if they continue to work on their craft, receive constructive feedback, and remain passionate about their art, they can regain their confidence and achieve success.
Example-4: A job seeker who has faced rejection from multiple employers may feel dejected and lose confidence in their skills. However, if they continue to improve their skills, network with industry professionals, and maintain a positive attitude, they can eventually land a job and regain their confidence.
No one knows what you are
Self-confidence plays a crucial role in achieving our goals and objectives, especially when others around us lack faith in us. It is common for people to experience situations where they are doubted by others, and this can often lead to a lack of confidence and motivation. However, it is essential to remember that no one knows us better than ourselves, and if we have faith in our abilities, we can achieve what we want.
When we have goals or objectives, we may encounter people who do not trust us or our abilities. This can be due to various reasons such as lack of experience, past failures, or simply their personal bias. In such situations, it is easy to lose our confidence and feel demotivated. However, we should not let others' opinions define our capabilities.
Having confidence in ourselves means believing in our abilities and not seeking validation from others. We must focus on our strengths and work on our weaknesses. When we have faith in our abilities, we can take calculated risks and make bold decisions, which can lead us towards our goals. Even if we encounter setbacks, we should not lose hope and keep moving forward with our plans.
Ultimately, our success depends on our self-confidence, determination, and hard work. By having confidence in ourselves, we can overcome the obstacles and achieve what we desire, despite what others may think or say. It is essential to remember that no one knows us better than ourselves, and we must have faith in our abilities to succeed in life.
Don’t take criticism personally
Receiving criticism from others can be difficult, especially if it's coming from people close to us like our parents or friends. However, it's important to remember that criticism doesn't always have to be taken personally.
Criticism can actually be a helpful tool for growth and self-improvement. It can help us identify areas where we can improve and become better at what we do. However, it's important to learn how to differentiate between constructive criticism and destructive criticism.
Constructive criticism is meant to help us improve and is often given with the intention of helping us grow. It may point out areas where we can improve or offer suggestions on how to do things better. In contrast, destructive criticism is often given with the intention of hurting us or making us feel bad about ourselves. It may attack our character or be based on personal biases or opinions.
Regardless of whether the criticism is constructive or destructive, it's important not to take it personally. Remember that other people's opinions do not define you or your worth as a person. Instead, try to view criticism as an opportunity to learn and grow.
It's also important to have confidence in yourself and your skills. If you believe in yourself, the negative opinions of others are less likely to affect your self-confidence. Focus on your strengths and the positive feedback you receive, and use that to build your confidence.
In summary, don't take criticism personally, learn to differentiate between constructive and destructive criticism, and have confidence in yourself and your skills. By doing this, you can maintain your self-confidence even when faced with criticism from others.
Don’t compare yourself with others
When we compare ourselves to others, especially those who are successful, it can often lead to feelings of inadequacy and lower self-confidence. It's important to remember that everyone has their own unique path and journey towards success. Just because someone else has achieved something doesn't mean that you are any less capable or that your own progress is not important.
Furthermore, it's important to recognize that success often comes from a combination of hard work, dedication, and a bit of luck. We may not always see the challenges and setbacks that others have faced along the way. By comparing ourselves to others, we may not be taking into account all of the variables that have contributed to their success.
Instead of comparing ourselves to others, we should focus on our own progress and growth. Celebrate our own successes, no matter how small they may seem. It's also important to set realistic goals for ourselves, based on our own unique strengths and abilities. By focusing on our own path and progress, we can maintain a healthier mindset and build our self-confidence.
Fear of failure can also lead to a lack of confidence
Fear of failure is a common factor that can lead to a lack of confidence. Many people are hesitant to take risks and make decisions because they fear failure. This fear of failure can be so powerful that it can hold people back from achieving their goals and dreams. However, it is important to understand that failure is a natural part of life and growth.
No one can guarantee success in every endeavor they undertake. Failure is a possibility in any situation, and it is important to accept this reality. When people focus too much on the potential negative outcomes of their actions, they may become paralyzed by fear and anxiety. This can prevent them from taking risks and trying new things, which can ultimately lead to a lack of confidence.
It is important to develop a mindset that allows for learning from failures. Instead of viewing failure as a reflection of one's abilities or worth, it can be viewed as a learning opportunity. When people approach failure with a growth mindset, they are more likely to learn from their mistakes and come back stronger.
Many successful people have experienced failure at some point in their lives. Some of the world's most successful entrepreneurs, athletes, and innovators have failed numerous times before achieving success. However, what sets them apart from those who are afraid of failure is their ability to learn from their mistakes and continue moving forward. They understand that failure is a natural part of the process, and they don't let it define them or their abilities.
Fear of failure can lead to a lack of confidence, but it is important to embrace failure as a natural part of life. Instead of focusing on potential negative outcomes, people should focus on learning and growing from their failures. This mindset can help build confidence and resilience, and ultimately lead to greater success in the future.
Few examples of successful people who faced failure:
Steve Jobs: The co-founder of Apple, Steve Jobs, was famously fired from his own company in 1985 after a power struggle with the board of directors. However, he returned to Apple in 1997 and turned the company around, making it one of the most valuable companies in the world.
J.K. Rowling: The author of the Harry Potter series, J.K. Rowling, faced rejection from numerous publishers before finally getting a publishing deal. She also went through a difficult divorce and financial struggles before her books became bestsellers.
Michael Jordan: Considered one of the greatest basketball players of all time, Michael Jordan was actually cut from his high school basketball team. However, he continued to work hard and eventually became a six-time NBA champion.
Oprah Winfrey: The media mogul and philanthropist, Oprah Winfrey, had a difficult childhood and faced many challenges throughout her career. She was fired from her first job as a television news anchor and faced criticism when she started her own talk show. However, she persevered and became one of the most successful and influential women in the world.
Learn from scratch about your idea or product or your skills
Learning from scratch means starting from the basics and building up your knowledge step by step. It is important to have a strong foundation of knowledge in any field to have confidence in yourself and your abilities. For example, if you want to start a business, it's important to have a good understanding of your industry, target market, financial management, and other business fundamentals. Without this foundational knowledge, it can be difficult to make informed decisions, and you may lack confidence in your ability to succeed.
Taking the time to learn from scratch shows a commitment to your goals and a willingness to invest in yourself. It also helps to build a deep understanding of the subject matter, which can help you feel more confident in your abilities. For instance, if you are learning a new skill like playing an instrument, it's important to start with the basics of music theory and practice consistently. As you build your skills, you will feel more confident in your ability to play more complex pieces.
Learning from scratch can also help you overcome the fear of failure. By starting with the basics and building up your knowledge, you will likely make mistakes and face challenges along the way. But by persevering through these challenges and learning from them, you can develop resilience and confidence in your ability to overcome obstacles.
In summary, learning from scratch is an essential step to gaining confidence in yourself and your abilities. It requires patience, commitment, and a willingness to invest in yourself, but the rewards are worth it in terms of increased knowledge, skill, and confidence.
Your achievements in the past can lead you to lose self-confidence.
Let’s say that you are an underachiever in your life, and suddenly you overcome your failures and start thinking wisely, and create something by yourself. In this kind of situation, you might not have good self-confidence due to no achievements. In this kind of situation, you should know that your success has no relation to your past achievements because few people in this world have been an underachiever in their life and then after realizing, they became successful with their ideas and tasks.
Start earning money with your efforts
Especially if you are a man, start earning money through your efforts because earning money can boost confidence in a man. Your earnings will create some sort of individuality and independence in you. It doesn’t matter how much you are earning; it could be even a small amount. Start earning, and you will see an increase in your self-confidence.
Practice by looking into a mirror
Your confidence has to be revealed on your face in the form of expressions, body language, and your voice. If you feel that you lack confidence in yourself, then practice by watching in the mirror. When you practice yourself with the help of a mirror, then you can improve yourself by watching because you can see the change in you. The practice could be your upcoming interview or your profession or an onstage speech. This is a 100% guaranteed self-confidence booster. So, start doing practice with the help of a mirror if you are suffering from low self-confidence.
Often listen to inspirational music every day
By doing this, you can improve your confidence.
Often read the success stories of famous people
Because their stories will make you aware not only of their success but also of their failures and struggles. By reading their biographies, you will realize how those people were confident even in the worst scenarios.
Learn to be optimistic even in worse scenarios
Sometimes, life will knock you down repeatedly and make you lose your self-confidence. In this kind of scenario, you should stand like a wall and hit back against all those obstacles courageously with your confidence.
Be daring about your outcome
What happens if I fail? What happens if no one likes me? What happens if I face rejection? What happens if I lose my money? I am sure that this kind of fear will bother you if you have low self-confidence. Just be daring for your outcome, say to your mind that “I don’t care if I face failures or I am not bothered about rejections or I am not afraid of losing money or I will not give up until I succeed or I will find another way to reach my goal if I face failure.” Say these often to yourself when you are scared of something or someone.
Pray to God every day
You can pray to any god of your choice, but don’t forget that you need to be devoted to the god and remain consistent without expecting anything in return. If you plan to start praying regularly, pray with proper rules and regulations and ask your elders for guidance. Don’t expect immediate results from your prayers, as it is a time-consuming process.
By praying to God every day, not only can you gain self-confidence, but you can also gain intelligence, courage, and many other benefits. For example, my father's friend is seventy years old and has been praying to Lord Ganesh every day for forty years. Even at his age, he has a sharp mind and great intelligence, and he is still at the top of his profession, having earned a lot of money from it.
I still remember my MBA days, when everyone had to give presentations on a particular topic in front of everyone for thirty minutes. We had to form a group of five people, but due to my introverted behavior, I couldn't find a group and ended up alone. Although I knew the subject very well, I lacked confidence in my presentation skills due to my introversion. However, I started chanting mantras of Lord Shiva, and unexpectedly, I became very brave and confident. I gave the presentation alone for around thirty minutes with great confidence. After my presentation, everyone was shocked by my style and confidence, and I received applause from the whole class. So, friends, that’s the power of chanting mantras or praying to God every day.